He Said Goodbye

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All rights belong to the author, SnapeBlossoms

"Severus?" And it was him, silhouetted against the moon, his robes billowing majestically in the summer night's breeze. His face was hidden in shadows. She wiped her eyes and gave him a watery smile. "I'm so glad it's you..."

"Did he hurt you?" She had never heard him sound like this; he was usually so good at hiding all emotion – but she could hear rage embittering every word. She squinted, trying to make out his features.

"W-what?"

"Did he hurt you, Lily?"

"N-no..." He seemed to be surveying her without emotion, waiting for more, "He didn't hurt me, Sev, no..." Finally he seemed satisfied and he sat beside her on the worn, smooth log beside the lake bank, his face inscrutable. They sat in silence, staring at the rippling surface.

"Why are you crying?" He asked gently.

"I...I made a mistake. And it's one of those mistakes that..." She sniffed hard, slightly self-conscious of her bunged up voice. "...that is impossible to sort out..." There was an awkward pause. She felt him inching towards her. Finally he was close enough for her to feel his leg against hers.

"Nothing is impossible, Lily..."

"You don't understand!" She cried, turning to look at him abruptly. His face reflected the moon's white glow; a face that she had known for so long, she'd memorised each plane and curve, eyes of the deepest intense black... eyes that were now pained, his expression morose. "I can't do anything..." She clasped her face in her hands.

She felt his hand trail along her back, his arm around her waist, a path of warmth, of comfort. His fingers rubbed gently up and down her side; she tried to deny the shivers up her spine.

"If there's one thing I know," his voice was so soft, so close to her ear that she could feel his hot breathe, sending more shivers through her. "It's that you can correct any mistake. You can do...anything, Lily. Anything..." She looked at him; he'd grown so tall in their final year she had to look up.

"B-but..." he pressed a finger to her lips, silencing her. It almost scared her how possessed he seemed. He tilted her face towards his; she waited but he did nothing for what felt like an eternity...he brushed the remnants of her tears slowly with his thumb. He seemed to be trying to dedicate each nuance of her face to memory, his eyes staring into hers, black, glimmering pools of feeling and thoughts...she was the only one that could read him...this thought made her quiver.

"You're cold...?"

"No..." Another tear rolled down her cheek.

"Don't cry, please. When you cry I..." his voice was caught in emotion and he stopped, letting go of her face, looking away.

"Severus..." She said quietly, "I know...about the Death Eaters." She saw him stiffen. "That's why you came tonight, wasn't it?"

"Yes." Again they sat in silence.

"Please don't...do this. Please, Sev, if you care for me even a little bit..." He turned to her so quickly she gasped. He stared into her once more, with longing in his eyes. He held her face in her hands with a force that shocked her - and then he ran his thumb across her cheek again gently, as if he didn't know how to treat her.

"Emotional blackmail, Lily...you were always so..." he let his words run to nothing. He leaned forwards, their faces millimetres apart and then stayed very still...she realised he was waiting for her. Waiting for her to make that choice...

At that second she saw her life on two paths. There was James. With him there was goodness, laughter, light...and then there was him. Darkness, profundity and...passion. And he was giving her the choice – James wouldn't. He took her by the hand and she had to just do whatever he wanted...Severus was giving her the choice...

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