General L/n (Thomas Jefferson x reader)

Letters

Lemme see ...

The second I walk into my office all my attention is on the letter .

(I think we've all learned that the letters are in italics )

 Ma moitié ...

There's no word in any language that can sum up the brewing mixture of childish excitement and fan-boyish giddiness my heart is stirring . Mon ange , my most sincere thank you goes your way a million times yet I am in pain knowing that my letter has caused you upset ,but mon coeur I will pour my heart soul and mind into every curve of every letter to prove to you that my emotions are not grounded in a fairy tale with stories of infatuation and illusions . I've never felt anything as strong before and therefore refuse to believe it is all my heart's desperation .

With every drop of love in my veins ,

I pray you have the sweetest of days

T.J.

Thomas' POV

I gave James the letter to General L/n this very morning , she hasn't responded yet ... and that's okay , she's a busy woman after all ! She will respond whenever she has the time ... but how much time does she have ? I fiddle with my quill not giving any attention to the tiniest droplets flying in all kinds of direction . I would pay attention .I like my work place to be orderly , not as much as James' but orderly nonetheless - but I don't have any more consciousness to give , the General has it all . I shift my position so my back falls onto the back of the chair and I sigh looking at the clock . Let's see ... I gave James the letter at approximately 7:20 this morning and its currently ... 9:00 ... am . Ahem . In shock and some embarrassment I turn to look outside the window and it is bright as hell ... so it is still morning. It is officially 9:00  a.m. I let out another sigh . There's a part of me that wants to get angry at her , her beautiful self for distracting me beyond my wits but that side is easily overthrown by my inability to feel the slightest form of upset towards her . What has she done to me ?

I tilt my head up and deeply inhale with my eyes closed . Badum badum badum badum , my precious heart , mind slowing down ? Badum badum ... I guess that's a no . Knock knock . Knock knock . The knocking fell in sync with me heartbeat , how amusing ... I open my eyes to see James "What is it James ?" I ask even though my eyes have already latched onto the letter he was holding "This is for you , from the General" . My heart skipped a beat and my breath hitched , but I have to be professional "Thank you , Madison . Please leave it on my desk " I picked up my quill and James looks at me with suspicious confusion "Since when do you call me by my last name?" ... shoot ... too professional ! "I'm sorry James , I'm simply a tad tired ." He responded with a curt nod , placed the letter on my desk and left to presumably continue his work .

I gently pick up her letter . It's such a romantic idea , a letter she wrote for me . L/n received  the letter and it was important enough for her to reply .

Good morning , Jefferson

I've been curious. Reffering to you as Jefferson is very proffesional - as any letter should be... however utilising your first name might match the theme of our letters a bit better. Tell me what you think. That is not the main reason why I wished to reach out to you again. I understand you Jefferson. I truly do. The stories I have heard of myself , they are truly something. Tales of fearlessness, courage, quick wit. They really do paint me in an interesting light and if you allow me to explore a little tangent - Jefferson, you have a very peculiar taste in women. I don't think I've heard  stories of yourself indulging in a lady's company that is similar to mine ( except my dear Angelica ). Most men these days wouldn't want a 'rebellious' woman. I do have a sharp tongue , I am an influence , I am the reason for modyfing women's thoughts. I wouldn't be shocked if in the future we as women get more and more rights. Doesn't that scare you Jefferson? Excuse my vulgar assumption but I suppose it might be a sexual thing for you.

Now that my little tangent is satisfied. You must know those stories you fell in love with , it is quite clear they are not the full truth. You weren't there but take one thing from me. There are no heroes in war. I'm not proud of the things I had to do, neither is Lafayette, nor Hamilton, nor Washington. We all had to dehumanise ourselves. It isn't all bravery and heroism. It is being drenched in rain and blood and mud, your brain racing faster than the horses and your survival instincts turning animalitistic. The ones that died are in a way lucky. They were the only ones that remained humans during battle. I have scars. I have mental images that to this day mess me up. Do not glorify me. When I think back to the war all I can remeber is the overwhelming feeling of panic and dread.

Now that's out of my chest , let me end on a slightly happier note. If you haven't noticed , I know a bit about you. This besides being due to your reputation , it is also due to our personal interactions. You have seen me Jefferson so I'll leave you with some questions... Did we even meet eyes? Was it once? Did we even talk?

Have fun , Jefferson ~

Your favourite, General L/N

That was alot... I am ...freaking out ! Why would she say such a thing about herself ! I know it must have been so damn hard on her ... God dammit! I wish I could comfort her! Hold her in my arms , play with her hair and tell her everything is alright . Sigh . It'll happen eventually , I'll just be patient . She's worth the wait ...

[Few hours later.....]

God dammit! If she knew I would be spending the next 4 hours attempting to figure out who she is , would she still write me the letter ? No. I can not get angry at her. The very same lady that has been making my heart go wild ever since the letter arrived deserves nothing but my affection and appreciation... even though she is messing with my head and heart seemingly to no end. Is it as romantic as love at first sight? Perhaps she is someone I have always known . This is driving me insane. The thought that we must have been close enough at some point yet I didn't have the opportunity to hold her , kiss her hand , dance with her . It is very saddening.

I know the rest of the day I will spend not focusing on work but instead day dreaming about my one and only ... and then Y/n would yell at me... it's so worth it .