Not a Typical Princess (Princess Diana's Daughter)

Chapter 10: Finding a Place in the Monarchy

It felt like groveling, and in many ways, it was. Gwendoline was out of options. After the previous night and then morning classes, she had no other ideas. She had tried to work it out in her head so many times, but there was only one clear and simple answer. Vomit bubbled up in her stomach at the thought of it, and she hated even the thought.

Around noon, while Margo was out, Gwendoline took out a glass of whiskey and then chugged it. And then she did two more shots. When she found herself tipsy but yet coherent, she dialed Buckingham's private secretary's office. The voice on the other line was friendly when answered, and when Gwendoline replied with who she wanted, the line went dead for a few seconds. Buckingham's private secretary picked up.

"Your highness," he sneered, "what may I help you with today?"

"I've called to apologize."

"Have you, your highness?"

"I apologize for how I acted. It was uncalled for. It will not happen again." Gwendoline's throat burned with the whiskey.

"That is great to hear, your highness." The sound of papers flipping gave Gwendoline some hope. "I do see we have a state dinner in early June. That would be the best opportunity to showcase your language and hostess skills. Don't you think, your highness?"

"Yes." Gwendoline was in no way happy about early June, but it was the best that was going to come.

"I think we can get your birthday portrait done that day as well. That would be lovely."

"Yes, it would be lovely," she mimicked, eyeing the bottle of whiskey on the table. Gwendoline didn't dare to pick up the bottle and take another drink. Buckingham was not a stupid man.

"Your highness," Buckingham Palace's private secretary's voice changed, "I know it can be difficult to find a place in the monarchy. You are in a position that many royals have struggled with before. Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie moved into part time royal positions," he offered, but the two princesses weren't in the same position as Princess Gwendoline; they were lower than her. "Prince Harry struggled with his position for years, and he found that his best place was in the military." The more royals there were at the top, the more she was pushed to the bottom.

"You worked with Margaret," Gwendoline said. "What was her position?"

"Princess Margaret was a very unique case."

"Am I a unique case?"

"That is yet to be seen, your highness." Buckingham was done now. "We will see you in a few weeks, ma'am, for the wedding of your older brother to Ms. Markle." He hung up the phone.

Gwendoline held the mobile to her ear a little longer, pondering what Buckingham Palace said. Whatever he wanted her to do, she would have to do it if she wanted a place. Already, there were tabloids saying she was being forced out. Her quick action hadn't given her the intended response, and in a few days, it wasn't going to be remembered at all. In a way, in a few years, she wasn't going to be remembered at all.

It was always awkward being a spare. There was no place for a spare unless someone died. Gwendoline knew Diana had said that much to Harry, stating that he needed to find his niche. The princess never had this guidance because her mother died so young. Prince Andrew and Prince Edward had already grasped for some sort of power and identity, which led to issues; Princess Anne was almost unremarkable, but at least she was respected.

Teetering back and forth, Gwendoline knew if Margo was here, Margo would say that she wouldn't have to make her decision now. That was all fine because Gwendoline didn't know what decision she might make.

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When Margo got home from class, Gwendoline was still at the table, weighing her decisions. Margo sat down opposite of her girlfriend, coffee in her hands, and waited. Gwendoline tapped the table, her fingernails clacking against the wood. Her lips were pursed, and her eyes were narrow.

"I don't know what to do," Gwendoline said.

"You don't need to make up a decision now--"

"Time is running out, Go-Go."

"That's how time works, Gwen."

The princess ran her fingers through her blonde hair. "It's always been William and Harry's shadow. They would fight for the light because William naturally had it, and Harry wanted some attention. When Diana was alive, she gave it to them equally.

"I don't want to be monarch-- never think that I do." Gwendoline looked in her girlfriend's eyes, and Margo knew she didn't want it. "But there is no place. If I'm not in Wills and Harry's, then in my mother's. 'You look so much like Diana.' 'You have her eyes.' 'You have her spirit.' 'You have her fashion sense.'" Gwendoline dressed in whatever the stylists put her in. "'You have her attitude.' 'You have her compassion.' 'You have her humor.' 'You have her face.'" The list went on and on. "Of course, that always leads to, 'Who's your father?'"

Margo reached across the table and took her girlfriend's hand, squeezing it. "Charles."

"I know that, and you know that-- but it never stops the world from wondering."

Ever since Gwendoline was a child, everyone had asked her that question. They would yell it out to her at school. It was a very confusing time for her, and she never understood the context. One day she got sick of the paparazzi yelling it at her that she went home and asked why they asked such a thing. At first, Charles beat around the bush, but when Gwendoline asked again, he had gone into more detail, stating it wasn't a happy marriage between them and they both did things they regretted.

"Am I one of those things?" the young Gwendoline had asked in her school uniform.

"No, no, no, of course not." Charles pulled his daughter onto his lap. "You are perfect. You are the one I've always wanted. You're my little girl. You'll always be my daughter." He kissed her on the cheek.

After that night, a warning was issued to the paparazzi: that question was off the table. However, by that question being off the table, it led to arguably worse topics with the paparazzi. As she got older, everything that was said and done by the princess the paparazzi poked at. The paparazzi poked at her looks, and they poked at who she was as a person. Gwendoline had gained thick skin for most of it, but these things were not meant to be yelled at children.

Many people wondered why they never saw Prince George and Princess Charlotte, and these were some of the reasons.