Absolutely Yours

51

Arthit's POV

I felt like my heart was stabbed numerous times - it pained me a lot. It felt like the whole world was crumbling down right before my eyes and I can't do anything but watch. I found myself close to tears but barely managed to get it together for I am in public. I brought this to myself and I deserve it.

"Cap! " M cried out as they strolled towards me. Their pace went to a slow.

I eyed Kong after sparing M a glance - nodding my head off to acknowledge him. "Where are you going? " I was surprised at how casual I was able to utter the question.

"To our next class, we're actually late. This Kong was too preoccupied I had to haul his ass out of the room. " I was jealous. Jealous of how close they are.

Kong made no move and spoke nothing. M took a step forward, starting to head off, Kong followed suit.

No.

As he was about to walk past me, our shoulders gently brushed - I hooked my fingers with his. He stopped on his track and met my gaze. He was sporting a pleasant expression this time - the only consolation I have to ease my frantic inner self.

He squinted and slightly rose his brows as if asking me 'what'. I rehearsed the line I was going to tell Kong over and over again in my mind but words seemed to fail me this time. I opened my mouth only to close it again for words were left at the tip of my tongue. 

He unhooked our fingers, I tried to reconnect but he was quick to dodge. I turned to watch his retreating back.

My heart wrenched in my chest as I try to blink my threatening tears away. 

Being ignored by the person you love, hurts. 

Feeling dejected, I sauntered aimlessly. I wasn't in the mood for anything anymore. Why was I so stupid being tongue-tied in front of him?  Was it difficult to say sorry? 

I managed to go on with my day, with the help of Knot - tugging me along, it was more like dragging me along for he had to push me from time to time just to get me going. He was very perplexed at me but asked me no questions because he knew better. Bright's lame jokes sold on me. I laughed exaggeratedly causing the others to worry - claiming I wasn't being me. 

"Are you okay? " Ton touched my head,  checking if I was really fine. "Where's Arthit? "

I made a pfft sound to ignore him. 

"Seriously, are you really?" Prem queried, concern was on his face. 

"He was funny. Why wouldn't I? " 

"You tell us. " Knot was difficult to read. There was a hint of concern and demand on his tone. 

"Hehe, I'm fine. " except I wasn't.

"Kong is quitting the team because he'll be transferring to BKK U." Bright nonchalantly spat out of the blue. 

"What?"

It was as if on cue, M entered the gym with Kong behind him. He was all smiles while talking with May. I noticed everything. I noticed how his hand on May's elbow guiding her in. I noticed he had the woman's bag on his shoulder. I noticed he was intently paying attention at what she was saying. I noticed how his eyes sparked while looking at her. And, I noticed his annoying smile went wider and wider as she went on talking that's probably about nonsense. I noticed he had his phone on his hand, gripping it tightly. It meant that there's no way he wouldn't see my messages. I noticed my blood flowing up making its way to my head. I noticed I am going to reach my boiling point for I am close to wringing her neck. I can take, well not really, but it was more bearable being ignored than seeing him with someone else right before my eyes. I noticed my veins were about to explode and it won't do me any good if I don't do anything about it. Before I could think clearly what to do, I walked towards them - fuming. I didn't bother to hide it. 

Screw it. 

I tuned out every body - my gaze were aimed at Kong who was still unaware of me prowling my way towards him. I stood exactly in front of them, blocking their way. Kong still had his smile on when he tore his gaze from her and looked at me. His smile irked me so I used my hand to wipe it off his face by touching both side of his cheek and turn the smile into a pout. If he was angry,  I wouldn't know for before he could react I roughly took May's bag off his shoulder and handed it to her - slowly but surely, trying to send a message. Then I laced my fingers on Kong's and dragged him away. 

I halted when I saw no one and out of everybody's earshot. I pivoted on my heel and faced him. My heart plunked when Kong's stoic face wasn't giving me anything but I don't care. I gripped his hand tighter and swiftly pulled him in on an embrace.

I rested my head at the crook of his head and let the tears I've been constantly holding at bay the entire day shed. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. " I tightened my embrace. "I miss you, Kong." I sniffed and looked up to  him and locked our gaze. "so much."

Kong maintained a stoic face and my heart continued to sink down when silence was all I heard. 

I waited.

I waited.

And I waited.

I was already pounding myself into pieces and ready to yield to my downfall. I waited for Kong to say something - anything. I was even willing to accept his swears but nothing. 

I heard nothing. 

He said nothing.

He did nothing.

I resigned my head at crook of his neck again. Losing hope.

So this is it.

"I miss you, too."