Emily

Chapter Twenty

At one in the afternoon the next day, Emily was sat in her cabin, attempting to ignore the sinking feeling in her stomach at the thought of leaving England behind again.

Usually, she was ecstatic on board a ship, and couldn't wait to arrive at a new destination. However, this time, she had something to lose, something important that she was leaving behind.

Her farewells to Cassandra, Kit, Juliette and Allie had been awful, yet incredibly thought-provoking. Allie had been tearful, and reminded Emily of just how much she was going to miss the girl she had come to love as a younger sister.

When she'd held baby Juliette in her arms for the last time at the docks, where they had all come to see her off, that sadness had only grown. She loved the little girl, and knew she was just as much an aunt to her as Allie. She would miss Juliette's little giggles and her sweet blue eyes and the warmth in her chest when she held her close.

What she'd miss just as much, if not more, was Kit. Christopher Weston was an incredibly good friend to her, the sort she knew would always be by her side, even if he hadn't verbally reassured her of the fact. Kit was steadfast as a rock, while still being caring and considerate. He appreciated every last thing he had and Emily respected him for it.

When she'd hugged him goodbye just before heading for the gangway, he'd reminded her of the very thing he'd reminded her of at the ball. He'd whispered to her in her ear to choose what made her happy and chase after it. He also said that he hoped she was doing exactly that by leaving, which had stopped Emily short and made her think again.

Cassandra had only worsened this blow. Emily would miss her best friend more than anyone else in the world, for Cassandra had been there for her when she'd had no one. Cassie had been the one to reassure her that she was making the right choice, that she deserved to be happy and, for that, Emily would always be grateful to Cassandra.

When they'd embraced each other, tight as could be, and promised that they would see each other again, no matter what, Emily had confessed to Cassandra that she was not sure whether she could ever return to England to live there because she was far too scared.

"Be brave." Cassandra had ordered, smiling through the tears that threatened to spill as the others stepped back to give them as much privacy as they could."Be the fierce girl you were when you first left for America, the girl who would not take no for an answer and who fought tooth and nail for what she wanted. Because that is my Emily."

That had been all it took for Emily to cry. It wasn't awful, never-ending tears, but enough to show Cassandra that the message had sunk in.

"I'm sorry Nate couldn't come." Cassie had said, making Emily freeze. "He said that since you read his letter and still have not said anything about it, he couldn't come see you off. He wouldn't tell me what it was about, but I think I can tell. I think he's in love with you."

"Really?" Emily had asked, swallowing the lump in her throat. "Well, I don't suppose much can be done about it now."

"No, I think you love him too." Cassandra went on, ignoring Emily's previous statement entirely. "I definitely do not know why, but you really do love him too, don't you?"

"Your brother's lovely." Emily had defended him, smiling through the pain as she remembered all the wonderful things he'd done for her and all he'd said to her in the past that had made her day brighter. "But I'm afraid you'll soon have Mary for a sister-in-law."

"Nate would die before he married Mary." Cassandra had scoffed, rolling her eyes at Emily. "And, if my brother had such poor taste, I would kill him myself."

A few hugs and endless promises later, Emily had gotten onto the ship and was given her cabin. It was lovely and plush, but the decor reminded her of Somerhall which then reminded her of Nate. Everything somehow led back to him.