Please don't go (Alec Benjamin)

Part 7:alone

"Wish I could find the piece in me
To see the good things that you see.
It's not that easy...but if I saw me through your eyes."

I finally got out of the hospital but things still haven't got better.
Macy hates me,I'm in total pain,and right now I have no one with me.
Again like every other time I got a phone call.
But phone calls to me mean bad luck.
I picked up the phone and said hello.
"Hi is this Alec Benjamin."
"Yeah why?"
There was a moment of silence like I said always bad luck.
"We are gonna need to discuss something serious at your house."
"Why can't you tell me through the phone?" I asked
"Do you really want to hear it over the phone?"
"Just tell me." I said starting to get mad
"Alec we don't know how to tell you this."
"Ugh just tell me." I said harshly
"Alec........................your mother has been killed."
At that point I couldn't breath. I dropped my phone. Tears forcefully came out of my eyes.
It felt as if everything disappeared.shes gone now I will never see her again.
Why couldn't it have just been me? I deserve it not my mom.
I yelled out loud and I punched a wall.
Why is it that bad things always happen to me? Can't life just be normal for once.
I remember all the times I treated my mom like shit. I hate myself so much for it.
How could have my mom loved me just how?
I started punching a wall it hurt but I didn't care.
I would do anything just to see her again i miss her.
I have never gotten to say i love you.
I laid down in my bed crying my eyes out still.
Until I drifted off into sleep.
(Time skip)
I woke up peaceful until I remembered the news a few tears slipped my eyes.
Then I heard a knock at my door.
I went to open it and I opened the door to see Macy standing there with pity in her eyes.
"What do you want?"
"I just came to see if your alright?" She said calmly but for some reason I got pissed off.
"Alright! Do you really think I'm alright my mom just died and the worst way possible she was killed. I never get to see her again the woman who raised me to be the person I am today. So just to let you know I'm not alright. Hell! It's not just about my mom isn't about the world because for some fucking reason the world hates me.
I never have luck and if I did it would be ruined and to be honest I think the universe should give me something good because I have nothing now.
No one cares about me any more. I try and I try to be a better person but I just can't.
Apparently I don't matter any more I used to be so happy.
I had my family I had a beautiful amazing girlfriend but ever since you left my life has been shit ......and I don't know how to get better so."
Then the room went silent.
"Alec you know that's not true." She said
"Sure it isn't" I said harshly.
"Alec I'm sor-"
"What your sorry it's not like you can bring my mother back....you ruined my life so just go away and leave me alone."
What the fuck is wrong with me?
"Look I am trying my best but if you can't realize that then I guess .....I guess you don't deserve me." Then she left
She left me all because of me.
At this point I knew I was truly alone.

Hiiiiiiiiii it's me! I just want to say I'm so grateful for every person who reads honestly I don't deserve it. But I hope you liked the story I know it's really sad but maybe it's good:) anyways I hope your happy and had a good day byeeee😊