thirty | the final result

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december 12th

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december 12th

X A V I E R

THE SCANS AND PROCEDURES WERE DRIVING ME MAD, ever since the ninth of December doctors from all over the world had been treating me. They had kept me in Houston for only one day, then had sent me back to London. After every chemo treatment I felt more exhausted, after every pinch of the needle buried into my skin I felt sicker and after every talk with either my nurses or doctors I felt more depressed. I hadn't had the chance to give Autumn a call, because I had been incredibly busy dying in the hospital, except for today.

"No beer?" Beau gasped when he walked into my room and took a seat on the chair across from my bed.

"They'd kill me. Besides, they're all gone," I sighed.

It was quite relieving to see how good Beau was doing – he looked way better than the time I first met him in the corridors of this hospital. Although he had gotten bald as well, he still looked like a young, fresh man who tried to enjoy every second of his life. I didn't remember me being like that in the past.

"You know what the doctors told me today?" he smiled widely at me and I shook my head. "By Christmas I'll go into recess, because I'm doing so great. From then I'll have to do some checks, but they don't suspect more leukemia in my body. Ah, you don't know how fucking happy I am."

"I'm very happy for you," I said with a genuine tone in my voice.

"Come to Liverpool when it's Christmas, my mum would like to have you over she said."

"Really? That's adorable," I moved a bit in my bed and looked at the papers on the little drawer beside me where I wrote Autumn Leaves & Pumpkins Please on. "But I don't think I'll still be around by Christmas."

"What do you mean?" Beau frowned and scratched his neck.

"Tonight I have a very important talk with my nurses and doctors."

"You think they..." he wasn't able to finish his sentence, yet I still understood what he was referring to.

"Yes."

Beau pierced his blue eyes into mine and started getting a bit teary to my big surprise. He stood up and walked over to my bed – the facial expression on his face showed a simple thought of I don't care anymore which probably meant that he was going to do something he supposed I didn't like. When he was close enough, he wrapped his arms around my body and pulled me into a tight hug, not willing to let me go anytime soon. The feeling of the warm skin against mine made me remember how good hugs felt. Although it was a weird thought, it reminded me a bit of Autumn's hugs.

After some time I decided to put my arms around him too and his hug only became tighter.

"Bro..." he said.

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