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"No, no, no, no, no..." I refreshed the page multiple times and got the same result. Our account was deleted. Tears pricked my eyes as all our hard work was gone. I quickly swiped up and tapped on Haknyeon's contact. It went straight to voicemail.

I tried multiple times before giving up. How could he do this to me? How could he just delete 2 years worth of content? The door to my room opened and I was soon hugged from behind. "What's wrong?" "It's gone, dad. Our hard work..." I sobbed loudly into my arms.

[Earlier that year...]
"Hak, wait up!" "I said you gotta catch me if you wanna know!" I picked up my pace as I chased him down. I grabbed his arm and halted his movement. "Alright, confess." "Do you really wanna know?" "Of course. I love gossip."

"So Mina really went down on a girl?" "Yeah. I don't know if there's proof, but that's what Chanhee told me." "Chanhee knows everything about everyone." Hak jumped the white lines on the street as we crossed. "He doesn't know shit about me, just you."

I gave him a confused look. "What do you mean?" He stopped then faced me. "Everything he knows is false. I like to keep my life secret from those like him. People like Chanhee are a double-edged sword. Be careful." He was being philosophical these days and it concerned me.

"Hak, is something going on at home?" "No, not at all." "Then, are we going to record at my place? Scripted or unscripted?" "Unscripted. There's something I want to say." Something inside me sank. "May I know what it is?" "Can you wait until we start?"

I opened my bedroom door then tossed my book bag off to the side. I slid into my chair then turned on my computer. "She still hasn't come back?" I frowned as I heard a marker squeak. "She hasn't..." I logged into our account and saw the usual overflow of notifications.

"Hak, people are confessing their love for you again." It's all I ever saw. "I love Haknyeon", "Marry me Hak", "I want to have your kids". It was sickening. "Hey, why so glum Kev? You've got some too." "Hardly..." He gingerly wrapped his arms around my neck.

"Jealous?" "Yes." "Don't be Kev. It sickens me to see comments like that. They really think they have a chance with me." I looked at him as he walked over to get our props. He was being way too strange today. "Hak, are you sure everything is okay?"

He finished setting up our background to conceal our whereabouts. "Let's start." He sat next to me then fixed his hair. "You act like a celebrity." "We are. Podcast celebrities." I rolled my eyes then clicked the button.

"So, there's something I wanted to talk about today." I sat quietly as Haknyeon took the floor. "Today, I want to talk about rape and sexual assault." "What?" I quickly pulled Haknyeon out of the room then glared at him. "What the hell? That's not what we're known for."

"I think it's something we should address no matter what." I sighed as I crossed my arms. "You could've at least told me so I could prepare myself." "That's the thing. I didn't want you to be prepared. I said unscripted today." "Fine, fine. Let's head back."

I sat quietly as Haknyeon talked about the topic and only spoke when he talked to me, asked me questions or if I felt something had to be said. I noticed more people had tuned in than usual. "I know it's hard to speak up about it, especially if someone you know did it to you."

"But think about it this way. You can protect others from suffering such a traumatizing event. I thank you all for watching in, especially with a topic like this. It's scary to speak up, but it's important that you do. Have a good morning, afternoon or evening."

He ended the live then looked at me. "I'm sure you're wondering why." "Obviously." He pushed his hair back then sat back. "Mina raped that girl." "What!?" He nodded as he twirled his phone. "How do you know this..." "It's interesting what you learn from listening."

"Did you go there personally?" "No. Mina said it herself." "No way." "A few drinks makes even the tightest lipped person spill dark secret." I couldn't believe I was hearing this from Haknyeon. He was always an honest and good guy. "You're changing Haknyeon."

"Maybe you're falling behind. Maybe if you took off your rose tinted glasses, you'd actually see things for what they are." He has raised his voice at me. This had never happened before. "Maybe you're just upset that my life is better than yours."

"As if I'd want your picture perfect life." I held him by his collar in rage. "You know damn well my life isn't picture perfect! You know my mom disappeared over 3 months ago and hasn't come home!" A few tears fell as I gripped him tighter. "Calm down, Kev..."

"You expect me to calm down after everything you just said?" "I'm sorry." "What...?" He moves my hands back to my sides then held my shoulders. "I'm sorry. I was upset and I projected it onto you. I know you're sore about your mother..." "You jerk..."

I gave his cheek a good slap then kicked him out. He had gone too far. I opened the door to my bedroom then flopped onto my bed. Was I viewing things from rose tinted glasses? Was I on my own world while others are suffering around me? Was that why my mom left...?

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