FOR ALL THE GIRLS !

04. chapter

[ NOW CLOSE YOUR EYES,
AND PLEASE UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE STILL YOUNG,
AND THE UNIVERSE IS ENDLESS,
AND SOMEHOW,
EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY !
— tullipsink. ]

♡

"IS SOMETHING WRONG?" Farah asks.

Her hand hovers over his and with a slight shake of his head, he dismisses her worry.

"Okay." She shrugs. "Talk to me about it if you want to." Wesley cocks an eyebrow at her nonchalance but turns back to eating his food again.

It's not like he wants Farah to ask him, but her usual response whenever Wesley mopes is slightly different.

He shoves another piece of bread inside his mouth. It's tasteless.

Farah snickers. "Jen, look at this." She says, grabbing her new friend, Jennifer's attention. Since Wesley wants to keep his mind off Lana during whatever opportunity he can, he listens in as well.

"Dude, Jen, seriously look at Barbs over there." He shifts his attention to a girl that's in some of his classes. Tall, lanky legs decorate her fragile frame.

Farah snickers again, "seriously what is she thinking wearing shorts? It's like you dressed up two rakes." Jen snorts at that. "Honk honk, raking through."

Not this shit again. He thinks, tired.

Before Farah can call out to Barbara and 'comment' he grabs her hand and Farah turns over, surprised.

"What is your problem?" He snaps, clicking his tongue. His girlfriend raises a brow and shrugs her shoulders, unaware of what he's talking about.

"About what? I didn't do anything? Why're you so mad?" She asks, ripping her hand away from him. Jen peeks over from the side curiously and Wesley can feel Maurice's curious stare on him.

He scoffs, not wanting to explain and gets up.

"Babe, what's going on? I won't know if you don't tell me." She panics, shooting him a plea.

He mutters a 'whatever' and walks away.

♡

"You're back." Lana states quietly.

Wesley nods. Instead of the ground, today she's on her bed, although she still hugs her knees to her chest religiously like last time.

"Did you read it?" She asks, after a while.

He's taken aback by the question. Last time it was super hard for Wesley to get her to answer anything, and here she was, asking a question.

He ponders whether to answer it honestly or not. Telling a girl he read her diary definitely isn't one of his proudest moments. He doubts his mum would approve.

"Uhm, yeah." His voice is barely above a whisper. Shame and embarrassment courses through his body and his cheeks tint pink. Wesley settles on the ground, crossing his legs.

Lana's eyes flit over to his, for a split second before she settles her gaze on the creases made on the bedsheet due to her weight.

"You must think I'm stupid. Or spoiled." She mutters.

Wesley opens his mouth to speak, but after contemplating what he might say he closes it again. He used to, think that. Not that she was stupid, but what she worried about was stupid.

But then he remembers the conversation he —quite awkwardly, he might add — had with his mother.

Wesley's never been a silent boy, and it's hard for him to refrain from wondering about tons of stuff.

Also, he has no shame so he had asked his mum if she's ever worried about simple things.

She had raised a brow confusedly but answered nonetheless, telling him that yes, of course she's done that.

When he had replied saying it was stupid, the answer she had given him was priceless to him.

"I don't think that." He says gently. He looks up. "You know, my mother tells me that if you start panicking about something, chances are you've been worrying about it for a long time and you've just reached your final straw."

"I've reached my final straw alright, it's hard to stay positive when nothing works your way."

"Tell me about it." He says suddenly.

"About what?"

"Why you want to be one, a model I mean. Tell me all about it."

♡

[ A/N : hello. Yes, I know I haven't updated in a while and the update I finally put out is this short crap? Sorry lol, but slow is the pace for me. It'll pick up in a bit so don't worry. Also, super random but I just want to tell you that it's completely okay for you to crush on a guy, fantasize about him, and imagine lots of stuff with him. Lots of times when this normally happens, for me even id shake my head and I'd be grossed out at myself cause like wtf, me, ME? but I just want to tell you that it's super normal, its because of the hormones, don't beat yourself up over fantasizing about some guy you know, it's okay, trust me. I love u ]