fifteen ; l.h.

him

luke had recovered from his sickness rather quickly with noelle at his side.

during that time, they had multiple conversations about her having to leave and even then, it was difficult for him to accept the fact that she was.

ashton gladly gave them their space, but he didn't forget to pop in to lighten the mood when he could - which was much appreciated by both of them. the sadness never failed to return afterwards. 

"are you sure you guys have to go back to queensdale?" ashton watched as the two packed up luke's car with their things. "can't you stay longer?"

luke slammed the trunk shut and shared a look with noelle as she gave her new friend a sad smile.

"i wish we could. but i - uh - i have to get ready," she replied. knowing what she meant, the curly haired boy nodded softly, eyes dull.

luke hated this. he hated watching as she hugged ashton goodbye for the last time. he hated when ashton pulled him into a hug of his own, muttering that things would be okay.

he hated when they got into the car together silently, ashton watching them as the car moved into the distance. he hated the depressing air between them.

he was back to hating everything.

their hands were interlocked tightly over the dashboard between them, the grip of their hands saying all the things they were unable to.

his mind wandered back to the first time he'd held her hand. stifling a small chuckle, he remembered how he felt back then. he was so happy to be so close to her warmth, to be able to experience her as a being.

now, holding her hand felt like he was losing everything. because he was. he was losing his entire world and what else could he do but watch?

-

"it's so...empty," luke whispered as he walked around noelle's completely empty room.

they'd spent so long trying to fit all of her things into boxes, all while trying to keep their emotions at bay. it was a tough few days for both of them and this was the day that noelle was leaving.

she'd managed to get her parents to wait downstairs while she said goodbye to the house and - unknown to them - luke.

"i know," she said back, mouth set in a firm line. "i don't think i can do this."

he moved to her and grabbed her hands in his. "hey, it'll be fine. we'll get through this."

"how are you so sure?" noelle inquired, eyes watering.

"i'm not," luke admitted, "but we can still talk everyday. texting, calling, emails, letters. we'll keep in touch any way possible."

"it won't be the same," she disagreed, shaking her head gently. "i need you with me."

"no, don't cry," he mumbled, wiping a fallen tear from her face. "god, i love you noelle."

"i love you too lucas," she choked out through her whimpers.

he wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on her head, his own tears dampening her hair slightly. they stood there together, sniffles and mutterings of 'i love you, don't leave me' filling the empty space of the bare room.

vaguely, the sound of honking could be heard and that was noelle's cue that she had to leave. they pulled away, leaving their hands interlocked as they exited the apartment and took the elevator down to the lobby of the complex.

before she could leave, luke placed his lips firmly on hers, kissing her like his life was dependent on it. the small act was passionate and sad and if they didn't have to, they wouldn't have separated. but they did.

as noelle made her way out of the building, body visibly shaking, luke called out to her one last time.

"wait!" she turned, tears still present in her eyes as she raised an eyebrow. "forever and always, right?"

"forever and always," she promised. "and even longer than that."

then she was gone, leaving luke on the floor of an empty apartment hall, screaming into his hands.

-

he wasn't sure what possessed him to go to the rooftop that night.

it might've been the sadness eating at his heart or the fact that everywhere else seemed much too empty.

either way, in an act of weariness or whatever it was, luke found himself climbing up the metal steps to the rooftop robotically, the wind silent as he pushed through the heavy metal door. 

the lights of the city shone happily before his eyes, the complete opposite of how he was feeling. he usually would've relished in the sight, but without the sound of a certain someone's soft breathing beside him, all he felt was empty.

fifteen

he walked slowly towards the edge of the roof that held so many memories - good and bad.

fourteen

as he did so, he could practically hear noelle's voice, talking to him in a hushed tone, telling him that she loved him.

thirteen

luke stood on the concrete ledge like he had numerous times, eyes taking in every inch of the town below him.

twelve

"why did you leave me?"

eleven

"you made me so happy."

ten

"please come back."

nine

his lip quivered as the words died on his tongue, looking down at his pale hands in desperation.

eight

he tried to run through the few reasons he had to live, realizing that when she left, she'd taken all of them with her.

seven

he fought the urge to answer his phone when it rang in his pocket. he believed it was noelle, but his mind was not ready to listen to her voice from so far away.

six

a yell tore through his throat as he tried to set his mind straight, his thoughts too jumbled and his heart too broken.

five

"what do i do?" his voice was raspy and he knew he'd get no answer.

four

he wished that she would appear like she had that first night, telling him not to do this to himself.

three

she didn't.

two

his eyes closed as he exhaled faintly.

one

and he stepped off the ledge.

zero.

+

i hope you all enjoyed this story :-)

i loved writing it and i would like to thank you all for sticking around for so long. it means so much to me that you've gotten this story so far and i'm still in awe tbh.

MAKE SURE TO CHECK OUT THE SEQUEL TO THIS! IT WILL BE IN THE EXTERNAL LINK.

QUESTION OF THE DAY: thoughts on the book? did you like the way it ended? anything you want to see in the sequel?

i love you all so much xx.