In Time We Will Heal

Steve Rogers!?

For that one moment I am quite speechless. I stood there and freeze. Steve Rogers is there talking to me. The mysterious guy in the bar is Steve Rogers! I was talking to him this whole time telling him about my day dream about himself! I freeze for a while trying to figure out my next move or something to say.

“What?! I just told you about daydream I have about you! Oh my God! This is every girl worst nightmare!” I said that with a red face feeling angry and embarrassed.

“Relax…”

“No I can’t relax! I…I..I. this can’t be happening. Oh my God that was so embarrassing! I am so sorry. You must have felt so weird about me right now. You know what? You can just stop talking to me right now and I won’t tell anyone about anything and I’m not talking to you again if that is what you want.” I said cutting him off

I’m afraid because of this, he would see me just another crazy fan girl. I am not. I am not obsessed with him. I am not his fan girl. I am not going to stalk him or whatever. I am not a crazy person that following you everywhere. I’m afraid to lose my job because he maybe thinks I am a stalker. Besides that, I feel so embarrassed about what I just did.

“Relax. I don’t see you as a stalker or anything. Hahahaha. Don’t worries I won’t tell what happened to anyone and no I’m not going to report you to the police or anything. Beside, we just see each other for few times. You are not a stalker.” He said try to calm me down.

“Okay so… why are you going to the diner and the bar? I never saw you anywhere near those places.” I said try to cut this awkwardness.

He told me again about the death of his co-worker, Peggy. He already told me once but this time with more details. He told me he and Peggy haven’t really known each other very well but the two of them are close. He apparently fights alongside Peggy before well we all know his plane crash in artic sea or somewhere. He was found frozen with what is left from the hydra plane. He was in recovery and sleep for nearly 70 years.

We talked for hours and thankfully it was a little bit slow in the bar that night. He told me about so many stuff from his mission while he still in the army in 1940s and his mission now with The Avengers. The ones that not confidential of course. He also asked a lot of stuff about me. I told him why I worked on so many jobs and why I left college. I also told him about my sister. It’s weird because I never really talked about my sister that much.
I’m saying this over and over there is just something about him that make me trust him like a friend. Not because he is a hero or famous. There is something about him that I could not figure out what. But it makes me see him more than a hero and famous person. There is just something that I have no idea what is it yet.

“I am sorry for your sister. You guys must have been so close to each other” he said showing his condolences.

“Thank you and we better get going the bar is going to close any time soon.”

"Are you going home alone? It’s almost midnight.” He asked

“Yes. It’s every day to me walking alone in the middle of the night”

“Let me give you a ride.”

“Really? Am I dreaming? Captain America just offered to take me home with his motorcycle?”

“Yes. I did. Now the question is would you take that offer?”

I decided to just go with it and take his offer. I never ride a motorbike with anyone or alone even. This is going to be an experience. Plus the one who is taking me is the one and only Steve Rogers. Who can beat that experience?

“Where is it? Your place?” he asked before starting off his motorbike.

“It’s near the diner just take left right before the diner”

“Okay here we go!” He said with a happy tone.

“Aye aye Captain!” I reply.

“Oh Gosh, you really don’t have to call me like that. Just call me Steve and what should I called you with?” he asked.

“Just call me Nia. Nice to meet you Steve.” I said with a smile.
We went on his motorbike.

He drives it carefully and slowly because he probably saw my scared eyes when he started to go a little faster. I hold on to him tightly and he can feel it.

“I bet this is your first time riding a motorbike with anyone?” he asked.

"Yes and to be honest with you I am still afraid” I answer.

“Please don’t be afraid I didn’t lose my ability to ride a motorbike since 1940s so I think I am pretty good at this and beside that what are you afraid of? We are going in a normal speed and I try to drive as safe as I can possibly ride a motorbike.”  He said that with a calming voice.

Because what he said I started to feel myself more calm this time. His voice is very calming. I finally could enjoy the road and seeing the city lights while a nice wind blow into my face. When we finally arrive in front of my apartment I said thank you and he give me such a friendly hug. I hug his warm body and he has a subtle musky scent.

That night I can’t even close my eyes. I still can’t believe what happened that day. I keep thinking about his smile, his voice, and his scent. I never even met a guy as gentleman as he is. He never touch me inappropriately, he didn’t let me walk alone at night, and he try his best to slow down when he knows that I am scared to ride a motorbike for the first time. It sounds stupid, but after 20 years in my life I never really met a guy like that.

Not even my dad is a gentleman. My family is not exactly perfect. But after my sister passed away everything becomes worse than ever. My dad that I really thought was a perfect man started drinking and become abusive to my mom and me. My mom blamed me for my sister death and the way that my dad treat us. My lives after that become so pointless.

I know my sister is the perfect child and I am not. But she loves me and she take a good care of me. When my parents won’t even listened to me my sister always there. She is the one who told me to pursuit my dream to become a chef. She is the one who always be there for me through everything. I think my parents being nice to me just to make my sister happy after she passed away they have no reason to do so. I am more like unwanted child in their life. So when my sister is not around they pretend that I am not exist. Hard of course, but as I said my sister truly love me and that is the only thing that matters.

My dad makes me think that all men are dumb and stupid. Since my dad become abusive I promise myself I’m not going to let men treat me the same way as my dad did to me. Since then I never really opened up myself into relationship. But with Steve, it was different. He is different. I can open up myself around him. I can actually laugh and smile when I am with him. I feel safe when I am with him. I tell myself all of that are just some stupid thoughts. He would never like me like that. He only talks to me because we both lost someone close and that just it. He just needs someone to talk to and I am available.