Erens p.o.v
1
1st I needed someone to take care of tarb. I though either armin, or mikasa and jean because they are together.
I couldn't really think though, I was still in shock and frozen. I couldn't move, or eat. I was in depression mode.
I needed to end it though, a live without Levi is unthinkable. I just miss him so much it's making my heart ache in my chest and pound like a hammer against a brick.
"Right come on!!" I slapped my face and got on with this plan.
I called mikasa, jean and armin round to discuss this.
When they arrived I looked ruff as fuck. I had giant black bags under my eyes and a pale face of white, I even had grey hairs.
'Knock knock'
"Hey guys thanks for coming.." I mumbled.
"Eh hey you alright?" armin asked.
"Hmm yeah why wouldn't i be? because I watched my husband die? im perfectly fine!" I snapped slapping the door once they were inside. the all looked at me worriedly. "armin I'm sorry, i just can't cope right now.." I tailed of when he hugged me. "it's ok what you went though if unthinkable". he whispered.
We went through and sat down. "So what did you call us round for?" Jean asked.
"Well I was thinking if something happened to me, that tarb would have no one so I have something to ask you guys", the looked like they were listening.
"I won't you guys to be god parents to tarb, if that's alright?"
They faces all went blank with surprise.
"Eren I'll be happy to" armin smiled. "thanks armin" I smiled
"Oh Eren em I don't know it's a big step-.."
"Jean sip it, we'll be happy to Eren don't you worry" mikasa said
"Thank you guy! thank you so much" I began to cry. the all came and hugged me.
2
2nd i needed to have the perfect timing, so alone. I asked armin before if he left if he could watch tarb for a few days, luckily he agreed.
"Hey buddy, I need you to be brave and what all's going happen, I want you to be strong. can you do that for me?" I.asked him.
"surely I can" he laughed.
"that's my boy, your father would be so proud of you" I cried, he came over and slowly hugged. "it's alright you go be with him.." he spoke calmly.
"wait what do you mean?". I asked
"I know what your planning to do, I'll be strong and brave. I know this has been hard on you, so you go be with him."
"Huh since when did you become mature?" I cried.
"When father was sick and you had to take care of him, I knew then I needed to be strong for you and him"
"And your really alright with me doing this?"
"Well I can't say I won't miss you, b-but you need to be with him, so yeah.."
I wrapped my arms around him and cried, "I love you dad, tell father that to", he pulled away and took his bag and left the house for armins. "I-I will son, I love you too" I whispered after him.
3- my death
I ran myself a cool low temperature bath, and got everything ready. I chose a knife and pills to kill me.
I took of my clothes and climbed into the bath, it was pretty chilly. I then picked up the bottle of pills and poured them into my hands, I shoved them into my mouth and ruffly swallowed them. I picked up the knife and slide it along my legs.
