Boobs and Other Potty Mouthed Words

Chapter 17: Warning: Rumors Aren't True.

"Are you ready to see her?" The nurse asks me, standing in front of the door to the NICU department that would reveal to me my baby sister. I look over to Justin, tightening my grip on Ryan's hand. Justin's eyes soften looking at the window.

"Her? She's a girl?" He whispers, crossing his arms. His heart was aching for my mom and our sister. I could see that. Any person with a beating heart could see that. I lift my hand and put it on his shoulder. He looks over and me and then at the nurse. "Yeah. I'm ready." The door opens and we slowly walk inside listening to the machines beeping and oxygen going. It was silent besides that, no cry from a child could be heard because this wasn't were children go to celebrate their new life. This is where they go to hang on the edge of it, to teeter on life and death without the ability to even understand. My sister wasn't alone, there were many children which means we weren't the only people suffering. Somewhere someone was suffering the same way. I just hope my sister survives.

The nurse leads us to a small incubator. I look in and see a little wrinkly pink person. Not even looking like a baby it was so small, she looks like a little doll with a pink hat too big to fit her. Laying in a mountain of blankets compared to her. A breathing tube hooked up as well as other little wires. I wish I understood what everything did but at the same time, if I did understand it would probably be too worrisome. "She's so small." I whisper, letting go of Ryan's hand.

"Touch helps." The nurse whispers to us putting a hand on my back. I walk forward, she takes my wrist putting my hand through a hole. I pause before letting my finger touch her shoulder. She moves a little, her legs going up and bending. Her hand starts to open, I put a finger in her palm and watch her body relax, her hand closing around it.

"Strong?" Justin asks me, I nod looking over at him.

"For someone so small." I mumble with a smile. After some time, I let Justin have a turn. His eyes lighting up as her hand cups his finger like she cupped mine.

"You're right." He chuckles rubbing his face with his other hand. We ask Ryan if he wants a turn but he declines saying he's afraid he'd break the baby.

Hours fade by into the night when we finally go into my mother's room to say goodnight. We kiss her cheek but she barely responds, staring out of the window looking up at the moon. Justin and I walk out when Ryan says he'll join us soon. We stand outside the hospital waiting until he comes outside, walking us to his car to drive us home. I sit in the passenger seat, taking out my phone I look at it. My text box still completely empty. I sigh buckling my seatbelt.

"Everything okay?" Ryan asks, starting the car.

"Yeah, it's just. . .Tired." I chuckle softly leaning my forehead on the window. He drives us to my house, and with a kiss goodbye, I leave and head up the stairs. I couldn't find dad's face anywhere. . .but I was starting not to care. I passed out on my bed.

The next day, I was woken up by Justin opening my door. "Grace," He groans squinting from the light. "Time to get up."

"Thanks." I sigh sliding out of my bed. He closes the door leaving me alone. I grab jean shorts, a tank top and a loose sweater, because spaghetti straps are against school dress code. And you know, shoulders are so disruptive to the learning environment. I slide on my glasses and run my fingers through my hair, thanking the lord above once more that Chris dared me to cut my hair.

Chris....

I go over to my bed once more, picking up my phone. I check the messages and find. . .nothing. Nothing from anyone. I frown, opening a new text. "Why are you ignoring me?" with a shaking thumb, I send my text message and head downstairs. I pop a strawberry pop tart in the toaster because some days you just have to load up on sugar and look at my phone. Staring at it, willing it to vibrate. Instead, I jump at the sound of the toaster and mentally kick myself. Chris was ignoring me. When I needed him the most. Why? It's starting to piss me off.