Chapter Ten

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I have about three hours until my appointment with Doctor Templin, and since Trixie doesn't have class for another hour, we decide to get some breakfast before either one of us passes out from starvation.

She calls Bill and has him meet us over at the Overground, the largest eatery on west campus. Bill lets us know that he's already there by the time we arrive, with seats saved for both of us.

He's undeniably punctual for everything, even something as informal and trivial as getting food. While I find it overzealous at times, now is not one of them. The place is packed and crowded as hell, and his early-bird tendencies are definitely paying off in our favor right now.

Several bright yellow signs are randomly scattered across the hall, cautioning everyone that it's slippery and to be careful. I look down at the floor. It's covered in haphazard muddy shoe prints and has a few soggy paper towels and disposable cups littered here and there as well.

It looks disgusting.

Suddenly, my appetite evades me. I can almost actually feel it leaving my body. If being at the clinic earlier hadn't already made me nauseous, the sight of this floor would have done the job perfectly.

After more minutes of rummaging through the crowd to find Bill and having Trixie say, "I can't hear you, you're breaking off," twenty times over the phone, I finally spot him at one of the bar stools by the east wall, frowning at a newspaper from behind nerdy glasses and running a hand through his disheveled dark blonde hair.

I tug at Trixie's elbow to get her attention. "There he is," I say, pointing over to where Bill is seated. We make our way over to him with a bit of difficulty, trying to not get knocked over as we constantly rub and bump shoulders with every other person who's also trying to get by.

"Ugh, why the fuck does it always have to be so damn crowded in here? It's like a goddamn flea market on steroids," Trixie scoffs.

I completely agree, but I don't say anything. My mind is still preoccupied with worry. I'm worried about what this Doctor Templin guy might potentially find. I'm worried that I don't have health coverage in case it is serious, and that I can't afford to be sick on any level right now. The Koplan performance is two weeks away, and I don't have the money to deal with this.

Aside from my grandmother, singing is all I have left. It's really the only thing I can rely on and call my own.

Without it, I'm...lost.

And whatever this thing is, it's disrupting it. I simply cannot have that.

I try to breathe and think positively. It might be nothing. Maybe it's all in my head. I'm probably freaking out for nothing.

I let out another frustrated sigh as I realize that I can't seem to convince myself that things are truly okay. They're not, and I can feel it my gut.

Literally.

As we approach Bill, I grab Trixie's arm and pull her back for a second to whisper in her ear.

"Hey, you mind not saying anything to Bill about earlier? I don't really want anyone else knowing about it. At least not until after I know what's wrong."

It's not that I don't trust Bill or that I can't confide in him. I'm just not comfortable with sharing a lot of my problems with people, even with Trixie at times. I'm not really sure why, especially since they're fairly open with me about the nitty-gritty of their own lives.

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