May 1999

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That warm spring evening in May was our big night. We were backstage at our first big time gig. Jamie was anxiously tapping the chair with her drum sticks, Alex was pacing the floor with her bass, and then there was me, I was doing my vocal warm ups and nervously strumming out chords on my guitar. We had finally made it and none of us knew how to handle it.
"5 minutes ladies" the stage manager said.
"5 minutes, oh god, do you understand what this means? Billie? Do you?" Jamie said jumping up and shaking my shoulders.
"Yeah, yeah I get it Jamie" I shoved her off and she fell to floor not phased. She jumped right back up and started jumping up and down. "Jesus Jamie you're like a little kid."
"Do we need to hire a babysitter?" Alex joined in making us all laugh.
"Yeah Jamie do you need a babysitter?" I laughed almost falling of my chair.
"Shut up" she tosses a drumstick at me, I dodged it and it hit the wall behind me.
"Whoa, hey, Alex started it." I act all offended. Jamie tossed her other stick at Alex, but Alex wasn't paying attention so it hit her right in the forehead.
"Ow." She rubbed her head. "Dumbass." She threw the stick back at Jamie who caught it.
"Haha who's the du..."
"You ladies ready?" The stage manager came back cutting off Jamie.
"YES!!!!!" Jamie screamed and jumped towards the door. Alex followed in pursuit.
"Ready as I'll ever be..." I got up and walked towards the door, looking back briefly knowing I was leaving everything behind at this point. Looking back seemed to bring back memories, the small clubs we've played, the outcast kids we've helped with our lyrics, all of it was going to be left behind at this point, there was no return. I turned around, guitar in hand, smile on my face, and left what I thought to be my past behind.
...
The stage felt like home. Playing with my two best friends in the entire world was the only thing I ever wanted to do from that point on.

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