1. Dancing For Mr. Alsina

10. Without You

Jasmine.

My body ached and desired for his touch. My lips longing for his soft ones to meet with mine one last time. If he only he didn't pull that stunt. I just want to know why. Last week's discussion was no help. It honestly only made me madder. I've been to rehearsals every day and we hardly made eye contact. He has no reason to be mad at me, but I could careless. I miss him, yes, but I don't miss the way he's been treating me. He treats me as if I'm something to fuck with every now and then when he's bored yet he made all that effort to pick off all of the real men in my life one by one.

A knock at the door broke me from my thoughts which caused me to lift from my bed and slowly approach the hotel door. I lifted onto the balls of my feet to look out of the peephole and...DONOVAN. I squealed loudly before snatching the door open and engulfing him into a hug with tears brimming my eyes. I haven't seen my boo in a month.

"Oh my God! I am so happy to see you," I exlaimed with a bright smile.

"After that shit from last week, I had to come see you," He patted my back.

I sighed. "Yeah. Yeah. Everything's peaches and creams over here," I said sarcastically.

"Totally didn't make sense to what I was saying, but okay. Whatever helps you sleep at night," He chuckled. "I just came to cheer you up because you need it,"

"I guess, but Shay's been helping me get over the whole situation," I shrugged before sitting on the couch with him beside me.

"It'll be a long time before you get over him," He stated the obvious.

"Yeah. I know that, but it's just been so much going on," I ran my fingers through the sides of my hair and left my fingers there.

"August is just tha' playa' type. Yeen know," He tried to contain his laughter while imitating August's accent.

"He doesn't even sound like that," I laughed while rolling my eyes.

"I know, but I tried my best," He shrugged.

"Anyway, like I was saying, it's just been so much going on. I should've just stuck with Isaiah," I sighed.

"No. The fuck," He scrunched his eyebrows together. "Isaiah don't want you. He thought he did, but he got distant, didn't he? If he really liked you, he would've fought for you. Just...like...August did," He said hesitantly.

"He ain't fighting for me. The nigga ain't even try to critique me on my dancing. I fucked up more than three times to get his attention, but he looked the opposite way," I rolled my eyes.

"Maybe he's trying to give you your space," He suggested.

"Maybe he's trying to give you your space," I mocked him. "No. That's not the case," I huffed.

"Yeah it is. I'm a man. I know how it goes. He probably don't know how to approach you because he knows he messed up real bad this time," He attempted to convince me.

"I guess, but he thinks we're in a open relationship-,"

"Last time I checked, y'all weren't in a relationship," He chuckled.

I made an "O" shape with my lips because he was right and I couldn't say anything back. Is that how August feels? I bet it is.

~~~

Donovan and I laid in my bed watching Aladdin. The perfect love story. I loved how he went through so much just to win her heart.

"I don't get this movie. Why he have to lie about being a peasant," He frowned.

"He truly loved her and he knew he wouldn't be able to marry her without being a Prince," I explained.

"Still don't make sense and Jaffa-,"

His sentence was cut off by a knock at the door. I rolled my eyes while groaning and pushing myself off the bed then scooting toward the edge. I stood on my two feet and dragged myself toward the door. I snatched it open, but I saw no one. I looked at the ground with a smile as I examined the flowers with a card attached to them. I bent over and picked up the items before returning into my room. I couldn't stop smiling at how generous someone could be.

"Who got you some thot tulips," Donovan joked.

I rolled my eyes. "Why does everything revolve around that idiotic word," I shook my head. "Anyway, I don't know yet," I said, removing the card to see.

First name I see, August. My smile faded slowly before I tossed the flowers onto the couch and attempted to rip up the card, but Donovan snatched it out of my hand.

"Dear, Jasmine. I'm sorry about that stunt I pulled. After a weeks worth of thinking, I finally understood what you meant. I was totally wrong and out of line for that. If anything, I should've brought you up on that stage and sung to you, but I didn't. I regret it with every bone in my body and I miss you," Donovan stopped at that part and looked at me. "Want me to finish or," He trailed off.

"There was a reason for me trying to rip that up. He knows exactly what to say to get back in and I just," I stopped before covering my face with my hands.

I wasn't crying, but just tired and stressed. It's been weird without him, but I'd lived this long without him, so I can go longer. He's lived without me as well, so it shouldn't be that hard. I liked what we had, but he don't know how to treat a female the way they should.

August.

I stared at the wall in front of me with my hands resting in my lap as I sat in the black reclining chair. I decided that I needed some more time to myself. Just to think and clear my head. Jasmine is the number one person bouncing around in my mind.

I can honestly admit that I was wrong, but I thought we had an understandment of not being in a relationship. I knew a time like this would come where she'd be falling deeper and deeper for me and I'd be chasing the next chick while she chasing me. I, August Alsina, do not want to put himself in that predicament, no. It's not going to happen, but I feel like I'm already in that situation.

I tried avoiding the whole relationship thing because I felt like I would be robbing a wonderful young lady of her youth or whatever because they gon need some love and affection and I can't provide that right now. I'm busy, but Jasmine is with me right now and she'll be with me for the Usher tour. We'll see each other all the time, so I might as well make things less awkward.

I rose from my chair and snatched my keys off the dresser and headed out of the hotel.

~~~

After finishing my last sentence on the note, I read it aloud to myself:

"Dear, Jasmine. I'm sorry about that stunt I pulled. After a weeks worth of thinking, I finally understood what you meant. I was totally wrong and out of line for that. If anything, I should've brought you up on that stage and sung to you, but I didn't. I regret it with every bone in my body and I miss you. It's just I felt we had an understanding at where we stood, but I can relate to what you meant. You're a girl so you're not going to want somebody tryna play you, but that's not what I'm tryna do. I actually like you for you and not what you have to offer like the rest of these women I fuck with. Brittany was only somebody I wanted to fuck, not nobody I could take to my mother. You are that. You're respectful, beautiful, intelligent, and everything under the sun. I just wish we could understand each other more. Hit me when you're down to talk :)," I smiled to myself at the letter.

I meant every word I wrote and if she don't want anything to do with me, I understand. We've both been without each other most of our life, so it wouldn't kill us. Just would hurt for a while.

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A/N: Quick, short filler. I'm supposed to be working on world geography notes lmao but whatever. I got an extra day and I can stay up late tonight even though I'm really tired :( I love sleep, but I love y'all more and I want that Valedictorian title B) Wish me luck ;-; I got 4 years doe lol

Comment. I don't have any questions ;-;

Vote tooooooo