Unreciprocated Love

Chapter 3: Acquaintances Meet Again

Now... how did I end up in that class again, I would ask myself, I barely knew anyone there. I mean, Dina was there but as with anyone else, she now felt like a stranger.
We didn't talk anymore for whatever reason and I guess that was okay, it was okay for a time.
You can't keep contact with everyone, sometimes people just come and go, that's the way it is. There's no need for holding onto someone when you can't force them to stay, and they might as well just leave again.

*scratching sounds from black board*

"That sound is terrible, wow I really can't stand it," Musa grinded his teeth, looking somewhat annoyed by the irritating sound.

That was my first time hearing him speak though, I mean, after the first time we met. Might sound ignorant, but I didn't expect him to have a personality really.

"Yeah, nobody likes the sound of chalk scraping on black boards."

Wow... could I sound more boring? Was that really what I had to say, I definitely killed the whole conversation.

"I guess," he said.

At that moment I thought... maybe I should just keep my mouth shut, I don't know how to socialize anyway, it might just have been my anxiety talking, but at that moment, nothing felt more right, than just being silent.
Maybe I should've said something, but I couldn't make myself speak even though I wanted to, I guess I was having a hard time feeling sorry for myself.

I had no friends in my new class and I couldn't make myself speak with anyone, school never felt so lonely before or I did make new friends, but I couldn't call them real friends, but at least I had someone, even though having no one would've felt better than being surrounded by toxicity.
I didn't know, at that time that those friendships that I've had made were toxic, you don't realize it until it affects yourself.

With time I realized that the friendships that I had, were changing me in a way where I couldn't recognize myself. Who did I become? I was a monster, thriving of using other people for my own benefit, I was talking behind people's backs... I was no longer anyone that I could stand by. I knew that even if it had come thus far, it would never be too late to make a change, I had to cut off the ties, but that made me feel so alone again... I was so alone.

In a short amount of time, I met a new friend, someone who would come to be my best friend for a very long time.