paradise | letters to Him √

4. serendipity.

I thought we were more in sync than you let yourself believe. Your every motion, every thought was in tune with mine, mixing and feeling until we were in perfect harmony occurred and laid itself to rest. There was no need to change, and no wish to do so.

I was a bit of a skeptic before I met you. There was no space for destiny in my mind, the very notion of someone else behind the scenes, determining what I did and who I met. All preposterous, I thought and insulting to my intelligence, frankly. However, I had an epiphany as my eyes fell on you.

The universe moved for us, made space for us to love.

I felt you holding back, not letting yourself give in to the temptation of total comfort. I understood you then, as I understood you many times before. I more felt the scars you bore rather than saw. You looked like a wild animal at times, scared and directionless, and if I didn't know any better, I would say that's what you knew yourself to be.

I don't think you knew how to love, or even what love was. Yet, there we were, making the best of a situation which the universe gave to us, as we didn't want to take a gift for granted. You didn't mean for things to turn out the way it did. I recognize that, and I hope you know that I do not resent you for the things we shared. From stolen glances to a passionate intertwining, it is all treasured gold. It is priceless, and you will always be a part of me. Know that.

You said I saved you. I sheltered you from the outer world with the steely resolve I inherited from my own battles. With a brush of the hand, I could sweep your doubts and your tears away, but was it enough?

You said I saved you. I think that is true in your mind, but not in mine. The sun shined brighter when you were there, and rainstorms felt like spring showers in my rose-tinted glasses. No, it is not I who saved you.

You saved me, my angel.

My world.