Ironic Supernatural Fan Fiction

Part 2: The Match

You sit down across from Lucifer, putting your arms on the table. Well, a table is what Lucifer insists you call the demon on all fours before you, who's back is where the match is being held. You both dig your elbows into its back but all it can do is quietly growl. Luci looks at it and gives it the death stare. He quickly threatens to throw hands, but the demon cowers at the proposal.  Lucifer then returns his gaze to you.

"You're going down," Lucifer says, himself unsure of the outcome of the match, or your thumb wrestling ability. You can tell that he puts on a strong and confident facade, but you can see past it, so you're not worried about the outcome of the match. He's too weak.

Crowley marches into the room, confused by the sight before him. Intrigued by Luci's anime stance, he decides to stay and spectate. He realizes this is his moment to shine. He shouts, "3, 2, 1, Go!"

You thumb intertwines with Lucifer's and you caress his prickly thumb. Luci's cheeks turn red, because he can't remember the last time he thumb was fondled in this manner.

"What are you doing?" he asks, utterly bewildered by your groping.

You use this to your advantage, while he is distracted your pin down his thumb and look eagerly at Crowley.

"Alas," he shouts proudly, "Y/N is victorious!"

You jump up from your seat and gallop around Lucifer. He looks down at his thumb in pure disgust. You start to poke Luci and hope he is so caught up in his own dismay that he won't even notice. You try to remember that you'll have to cross "Poke Satan" off your bucket list after this affair is up.

"How, how could I lose?" he wonders, with faint tears streaming down his face. "I have trained my whole life for this moment and, and I lost?!" He remembers always losing to Micheal and Castiel as a child. He recalls how they laughed at him whilst he silently cried in the corner. How Chuck had stood there, laughing along with his other children. Little did Luci know, Chuck himself couldn't thumb wrestle. Although, he was a champion at footsies. Lucifer looks as if he had the world, but it slipped through his fingers. He has a small spasm on the floor, but you are too caught up in your victory to notice.

"Boo-hoo let me play you a sad song on the world's smallest violin," you tease at Satan. "Welp," you shrug, "time to pay up!"

"Fine," the Devil wipes away his tears,"who would you like?"

You pretend to look around and observe all the demons, but you already know who your choice is. "Crowley," you state, satisfied with your decision. You look over at Crowley and he looks horrified. Before he knew what was happening he was being stuffed in a garbage bag and plopped onto the back of your broomstick.