found

stay

the next morning, dan wakes up to the bright sunlight coming on through the wide window in the living room. he checks his phone, it was 8:35. phil and alex were long gone.

he sits up and yawns. for a minute, a small smile crept on the side of his face as he just relaxes at the thought of being here but then, his memory reminds him of the argument from last night and a frown replaces his good mood.

his eyes waver as phil's hurtful words come back to mind. he really thought he whined? did he really think he always wanted his way? did he really think that low of him?

dan didn't know where he was going to go. there was no one around here. he still had a few hundred dollars that could buy him a cheap apartment for now and maybe if he worked long enough he would go back to california.

with light touches of his fingers, dan traces the names of phil's family tree on the quilt. a long time ago, phil had told him that his mother had stitched it a few weeks before she died. he never did talk much about her, but when ever he did, that's when he smiled the brightest.

he had to stop thinking about him now. they were over. if they were ever a couple? he had left his bag and the rest of his clothes in his room. dan yawned once more and wipes a stray tear off the corner of his eye. he'll go get the bag and then be gone by the time both of them return home.

but when dan gets up and turns around; he was standing there, his bag in hand and still in what he slept in last night.

"you're still here." dan says, he grabs the back of the couch for support.

his face still held that expressionless cold look. as he looks at him. "i thought you said you were leaving."

dan rolls his eyes. "well i am, can you give me a minute to actually get up?"

the room goes silent as phil shifts from foot to foot still clutching his bag. dan notices. "ready to get me out that quick are you? why did you stay behind anyway?"

phil doesn't answer, he just looks away, avoiding his eye contact.

dan sighs, he's had enough of this. he marches up to phil and snatches his bag away from him.

"dan-"

he slaps him. hard.

phil holds his face but doesn't show a sign of hurt. instead, his face saddens.

"i mean.... what is this? a fucking game to you?" his breath was labored as he looked up into his doubtful blue eyes. the slap that he gave him felt good, and he felt prepared to do another one.

"dan please listen to me....i want you to stay-"

"i don't believe you." dan says instantly,"if you really wanted me to, you would've at least tried to talk to me last night."

phil sighs. "i had a hard day at work yesterday. i wasn't open to discussion about anything that night."

"okay but why's didn't you just say that from the beginning instead of taking all of your pent up annoyance and anger on me? it could of saved a lot of time and not have started an argument."

he runs his hand through his hair and looks at him with hopeful . "look, i know i fucked up okay? i'm sorry."

"you broke my heart and all you can say is sorry?!" dan raises his hand to slap him again but this time, phil was prepared and grabbed his wrist, pulling it downward.

"dan relax." phil says as he struggles is his grasp, "please listen to me."

"you shut up! you don't get to speak!" dan looks up at him with tear filled brown eyes, "it's really not that complicated phil, all you have to do is communicate with me and love me but you can't even do that!"

this time, phil cringes. it must've really hit his soft spot because he lets go of dan completely. "stop it. please. you know i love you."

"it doesn't seem like it."

in the softest voice he could phil responds. "you have every right to be mad at me, and i'm not telling you that you shouldn't be but, please don't go. stay for me okay? i don't want to say goodbye to you."

dan turns away from and ponders. being with phil was more of a roller coaster than it should be. but this also was his first true love that was trying to make an effort to get him to stay. of course he wanted to, but he wasn't going to let him off that easy.

"okay," he drops his bag, "but we're going to have to start slow and learn from this."

phil nods. "i'll start by fixing dinner tonight."

this was shit. it's been awhile sorry school is dragging me down but pretty soon it'll be summer break and i can update all i want ! (:

~ alivia