The Unbreakable Code (a YJ fanfic)

Chapter Eleven: Mistakes

"Then you can turn a murder into art."
The Police, Murder By Numbers

"That was bloody beautiful," I sobbed loudly, clutching at Natasha's arm as we retreated from the cinema.

"You've said that six times now," Natasha helpfully reminded me, as she looked around for her car.

We'd just watched Star Wars Episode 9, and my sadness and joy were beyond me. It had been such an emotional rollercoaster, saying goodbye to the series that I considered such a major part of my life.

"You've been crying a lot recently, Em," Natasha remarked, as she guided me into her red Volkswagen.

"Really?" I sniffed, blowing my nose. "Well, uh, you know bloody well what? I-It's ok to cry! I'm totally over my stupid childhood rules!"

Natasha gave me a fond smile. "If only."

I whipped around to look at her; "What's that supPOSED tO mean??"

"I meant what I said. If only,"

"Well, uh, care to explain please?"

"Em, do you trust people?"

"No," I answered in record time like an automated machine.

"There you go. As I said many times before, you've got a long way to go. Those ideals were placed into your head from a young age, even when you were going to your posh school in South London."

"Hey!" I exclaimed, "Peckham is actually a rough area, you know!"

"You've still got an accent to rival the queen of England, Em," Natasha laughed.

"I do not!" I retorted, before realizing I'd sounded proper upper class then.

Natasha laughed again; "Sorry Em, you won't be able to escape the fact that you came from quite a wealthy background. You're not exactly the tough poor girl you make out to be,"

"I try," I said haughtily, as we stopped at a traffic light.

"Stop running from who you are," Natasha reprimanded me.

I groaned, "Do you have any idea how many times I've heard this speech?-"

"- take more pride in your background! I mean-"

"Natasha, my family's a mess-"

"- your mother was an amazingly talented woman, and your father, is, well sort of a crap bag, but you know-"

"Natasha!" I exclaimed, as she just grinned to herself. I groaned again, planting my head on the side of the window. "I went to see The Force Awakens with Dick, you know," I muttered, the information spilling out of my mouth.

Natasha raised an eyebrow, "Is that so?"

"That was the first time he saw me cry," I continued, a small smile flitting across my face at the memory.

"Ah, well I thought that was quite good!" Dick remarked, as we left the cinema into the light of day. "What did you think, Em? ... Em?"

I shook, clenching my fists, before bursting into tears. "IT WAS BLOODY BEAUTIFUL! IT WAS SO BLOODY BEAUTIFUL!"

"Em..." Dick spluttered, raising his hands, and lowering them, as I bawled my eyes out shamelessly. "Are you... Okay?..."

"BUT THEY KILLED HIM!" I wailed, "WHY'D THEY HAVE TO KILL HAN SOLO?! GOD, TELL ME WHY!!"

"Ain't nothing but a heartache..." Dick muttered to himself, before returning his attention back to me. "Em, I know you're upset... You made that very clear when you screamed 'no' in the theatre when he di-"

"DON'T SAY IT!" I interrupted, turning away, and rubbing frantically at my face.

"But you just did..." Dick spluttered again, confused and astounded by this extra, overly emotional version of myself.

"I KNOW WHAT I BLOODY SAID, SOD IT!"

"Ok... Ok..." He tried to soothe me, approaching me. "Uh... Wanna hug?"

In reply, I leaped on to him with so much force he almost toppled backwards. "THANK YOU, DICK! THANK YOU! I NEED SOME STABILITY RIGHT NOW!"

"R-Right... No problem..." He patted my back, smiling slightly. "And uh, by the way, Em?"

"YES?"

"You might wanna keep your voice down, people are staring."

"O-Oh-Oh bollocks!"

My smile widened thinking about it.

Ah, the good ol days.

My smile faded.

Pity it's not as simple as it was back then.
And I thought it was complicated enough when I was eleven...

Maybe Natasha was right. Maybe I still had along way to go. "Em..."

Raising my eyes, I suddenly did a double take, before gasping. Trucks. Surrounding the apartment block we left Dad in.

No. No, no, no, no.

I bolted out of the car, and into the building, ignoring Natasha's shouts.

Dad...

"Dad?!" I called out, as I burst into the flat.
My eyes widened in horror at the sight before me.

Furniture was overturned, blood smeared on the walls and carpet, several guns laying around on the floor, and to top it all off the kitchen was merrily burning away, with the smoke alarm going bonkers.

But what scared me the most was that my father was nowhere to be seen.

A/n: I ain't even kidding, Star Wars 9 ripped my soul from my chest, put it in a paper shredder, put it into a can, and sold it at Target, disguised as a tin of guacamole.
I shall never be the same 😔🤧😭