Free - Jonah Marais

Chapter 15

Jordan

I woke to the sound of persistent beeping. I didn't want to believe what I knew I was hearing, but there was no other explanation. I thought I was dead, but when I shot up, I knew I was alive.

"Miss?" A light knock came at the door. "Do you remember your name?" I nodded and smiled. How could I forget? There was no way I would possibly be able to forget any of what happened. "Jordan, are you ok?" I snapped out of my thoughts, giving yet another nod and smile.

Unable to talk, I didn't understand why. It wasn't because I couldn't form the words or create the sounds to make them, I just couldn't open my mouth.

"Jordan, I was asked to give these to you." She handed me a small note, and something wrapped in tissues. Unwrapping the tissues first, I found the golden chain that I had forgotten about. The little bluebird dangling innocently at the bottom of it.

Reading the note, tears coming to my eyes and fighting to be released, I attached the chain around my neck, thanking Jonah for letting me go.

Holding the bluebird in my hand, I made a promise to myself that I would never remove the necklace. This necklace, from now onwards, would be my everlasting memory of everything that happened. My everlasting memory of him.

***

Being released from hospital didn't feel like I was finally free. It was scary, terrifying to be honest. I had nowhere to go and nothing left. I most certainly couldn't just go home. My father would kill me the moment his eyes landed on me. Deciding to take the risk, and go back to my home, I got an Uber to the house next to my dad's.

"Can you wait just a moment? I won't be long. I promise." Receiving a nod from the driver, I raced down the footpath, stopping when I reached the gate. Quietly walking inside, I made sure not to get caught as I went up to my room.

Taking a deep breath, soaking in my surroundings, I grabbed the suitcase out of my closet and threw some necessities in it. The last two things that I grabbed were my photograph of my mother and the small safe, full of cash, from the top shelf of my closet. Looking at the photograph, my heart sunk, tears threatening to fall.

"I know that you wouldn't have let any of this happen. The thing is though, you're gone now. Thirteen years later and I haven't learnt how to accept that." Taking a breath, I looked away from the frame, tilting my head back so that I was looking at the ceiling. Looking at her. "I love you and I will never stop loving you, but I have to move on. I know now that they aren't all the enemy. I know now that I was unfair to them. I'm going to miss him, but I can't go back. I'm free mum. I'm finally free. I promise I will never forget you." Wiping the tear from my cheek, I threw the photo frame down on the bed.

Zipping the suitcase up, I ran downstairs, avoiding attention from anyone and everyone, making my way out to where the Uber was waiting for my return.

***

Five months. That's how long it's been. I've gotten an apartment and a job. It's only a small apartment and a simple coffee shop job, but it's a free life. No matter how free I am though, I still, to this day, can't forget how he made me feel.

Earning someone's trust is one of the hardest things to ever have to be done... especially when you give them no reason to give you that trust. So, what's harder than earning their trust when you don't care for it? Letting it go when you do care? Letting them go altogether?

I've had to do all of those things, and I can say right now, the hardest one is letting them go altogether. I knew when I said it, I didn't want to stop seeing him. Seeing that he was in danger, something burned inside, and I had to help. Even if it meant that I almost lost my life.