It's In Your Eyes

What about last year?

Dean's POV -

He joins me in the hall just as I'm returning to a normal skin colour, my voice hopefully readjusting itself too. I don't know what was wrong with me, but I hope Cas isn't thinking I'm weird...

But he smiles at me widely, allowing me to relax again. We walk down the corridor back towards the entrance.

"So, Cas, what music do you listen to?" I ask. I can't help think back to my duvet. And therefore, I can't get the image of his little, deep blue, ratty looking bedding out of my head.

"Oh... Just, stuff like The Smiths, and The Cure..." He nods along as he speaks, tipping his head to the side slightly as he tries to think. It's cute, he looks a bit like a small kitten confused by a toy. "And Elvis-"

"Elvis?"

"Costello." He finishes. Oh. "And the Attractions..." He adds, he must have caught my blank expression. "I'm really into British stuff. That's where the real music is."

He flashes me a smile. This smile, this wicked smile that send a shiver from my fingertips and toes inwards, colliding in my stomach. I know he's getting a little more comfortable around me, starting to show more of his character. A character he seems to keep hidden from most everybody else. And a character I think I could get to really like. I laugh at him, shaking my head.

"Nah, man. American rock, all the way."

In the hall again, still crammed with people, some pushing past us to go up to the dorms, Cas grows quieter and more withdrawn like before. I guide him over to another last year pupil, a girl with long hair, no one who's ever really seemed to stand out to me, to get the lesson timetable. The years are small enough that half one can have lessons together, Cas and I are handed identical sheets of paper at which he let's out a huff of air.

"Want rid of me already?" I ask, pretending to be hurt but I can't hide a grin when he looks up at me, shocked.

"No! I just-"

"Kidding, Cas. Just messing with you." He relaxes again and I have to bite my lip not to burst out laughing. He stares at me, at my mouth when I do so I stop quickly, looking down at my timetable.

There's a tap on both our shoulders and we both look round at once.

"So who's this?"

Castiel's POV -

Someone taps us and I turn to see a a red head right up behind us. My first thought is 'hi, Anna', but it's not her. She's pointing at me, her finger almost booping my nose.

"So who's this?" She's asking Dean. It's more of a demand though, but Dean just laughs.

"Hey Charlie. Nice to see you too. My summer sucked, thanks for asking." He shakes his head at her, 'disapprovingly'.

"Oh, sorry Dean. Forgot you were such a delicate little flower." She mocks back, making him go red. Then she throws her arms around him, hugging him very violently. "I missed you, Deanie! Glad you're back." And she pulls back and wiggles her finger at me again. "Newbie, who?"

"Castiel. He's in our year." He looks over at me, I've been quiet though all of this. "Cas, this is Charlie. My best friend here, the only other... I was going to say sane person here, but there's no way you're sane."

She slaps him on the arm, glaring, then smiles at me. "Nice to meet you, Cas. I think I'm gunna like you."

"Hi..." Is all I manage and they both laugh at me, good-naturedly. I relax a little and we walk away. She walks between us, looking at her timetable and squeaks, waving it near my face.

"Snap! Same classes!"

We sit on the grass outside. No body else joins us at this time, even though by the way they talk, mentioning people, they're part of a bigger group. We find out Charlie is in the same dormitory block, they're mixed genders in all blocks to encourage our interaction, only two doors down in 15. They catch up, remembering last year and get caught up in stories. I just sit next to them for a while, half listening to the tale about Crowley, the class brute, and the Latin teacher and the frog, half watching the way they interact.

Almost everyone is inside now, the odd group wandering by, and it's much quieter then inside... They prod and punch each other constantly. They could be dating-

"Dean, remember when we got drunk off those beers you snuck in from the village, and I tried to kiss the gorgeous Masters?" She cracks up.

"Meg? No you never told me! Oh my God, did she run off?" Charlie... She's gay? Oh... Dean looks like he's about to burst, his cheeks red.

"Oh. Well. Actually, she kinda leaned in but then Alister walked in and she wigged." They collapse into each other, holding their stomachs.

Dean looks up at me after a few minutes and smiles softly, looking a little guilty for getting so caught up in a conversation that excluded me. Charlie turns her attention to me too, sitting up straight and pushing her hair back before speaking.

"So, Cas. I heard you're Gabriel Novak's brother... He was here last year, so why did you miss your first year?"

Oh. Not this question. The question I've dreaded most. Do I tell the truth, a partial truth, or flat out lie? I could lose them as potential friends with the truth, but it could get awkward later if the truth comes out, which it will. But Charlie is gay. It's Dean I'm worried about, but surly they won't care.

So, I decide to come clean, or whatever.

I swallow hard and breath in deep. It's still, for some reason, hard to confront this side of my family, my life... My self.