Lost || Dean Winchester [2]

Chapter 9

"Dean! Wait! I can explain!" I stuttered as I scrambled to my feet and chased after him. The second he'd seen us, he turned and ran straight out the door.

"Oh there's no need to explain. You kissed my brother!"

"It's not what you think."

"So tell me Zara, what did I just see in there?!"

"A mistake. I didn't mean for it to happen I-"

"So what did you just accidentally kiss? Because I'm not buying it."

"I love you," I choked out.

There was a short silence before he finally spoke up. "Yeah, well clearly not enough."
And before I even had a chance to say anything, he turned and disappeared out of the building. As I watched him walk away, I could feel the familiar sting of tears behind my eyes. I'd spent so long trying to find him and now I'd driven him away again. I loved Dean. And I had to make him see that. But for some reason, part of me was also beginning to love Sam too. What was I going to do?

***

I stood behind the door to our hotel room, quietly watching as Sam sat patiently on the bed. I stayed there for a few more minutes before I managed to muster up the courage to go inside.

"Um, Sam? Can we talk?" I asked as I crept around the door.

He nodded. "Uh, yeah."

I stepped further into the room but I was still reluctant to sit down beside him. I couldn't allow what happened earlier to happen again. I would not hurt Dean. Not again. "About earlier..."

"Yeah, I know, you made a mistake."

"No...yes. I'm sorry. I care about you, I do. But I love him."

"Yeah. Got it."

"Sam."

"Just—just go. Please."

I'd ruined everything. What the hell was wrong with me? I turned and quickly exited the room. When I got outside, I spotted Dean in the Impala. He looked really angry. But who could blame him? After all, I had just kissed his brother. I acted in an impulsive and disgusting way.

***

Sam and Dean decided to continue investigating the murders separately. And I didn't want to cause any more trouble so I just stayed in the hotel room and waited for at least one of them to come back.

***

About half an hour had passed and I was still sitting alone in the hotel room, so I decided to go and find a bar to drown my sorrows in. I couldn't take this anymore. I needed an escape.

When I finally reached a bar, I froze the second I stepped through the door. Dean was sitting at the bar with a large bottle of whiskey in front of him. This was my chance to explain, to make things right. I cautiously edged closer to him and sat down on the empty stool beside him.

"Hey," I mumbled as I sat down next to him.

He didn't even look at me. "Go away."

"Can we talk?"

"There's nothin to talk about. You kissed my brother. End of story."

"Dean-"

"There's nothing you can say to make this better."

"Just hear me out. Please."

He sighed heavily. "Fine. You've got five minutes."

"Okay, so there's no excuse in the world that will make up for what I did. But I just need you to know that I'm really sorry. I love you and I don't wanna lose you."

"Well if you loved me you wouldn't have kissed Sam," he growled.

"I made a mistake."

"Yeah, ya did. Now go back to the hotel. I don't wanna talk to you anymore."

"Fine. We'll talk later." Even though I was leaving, I was still determined to fix things with Dean. I couldn't leave things like this.