Behind Teacher's Doors (TeacherXTeacher)

Coffee And Kisses

Saturday

Robert grunts. "Dave. I swear to Nickelodeon that if you do not stop jumping on my bed this minute, I will- Holy mother of all things- why?"

"Sorry, daddy," the child laughs, sprawled across Robert's thighs, his elbow still lodged into his father's stomach. "I'm sorry."

Robert shoves his elbow away. "Yeah, so is my diaphragm."

"Dad!" He groans when Dawn's voice watches his ears and glances at the clock. It's nine o'clock. What the fuck is everybody doing up?

"What is it, sweetie?" He groans, holding his stomach.

"Dylan ate my mascara."

Mascara?

"He ate your what?"

"My mascara!" She yells, entering his bedroom. Oh, yeah, sure. Everybody come on in. He's throwing a fucking slumber party.

"What the hell is mascara?"

She blinks at him. "Dad."

He thinks for a moment. "Wait. Give me a minute." Holding up his index finger, "the stuff that goes on your eyelids... Isn't that- no! That's the stuff-"

"Eye shadow?"

"Yeah! Mascara goes on your eyes... doesn't it?"

"On my eye lashes, dad."

"Right. Close." He shrugs. Dave pokes his chin. "Stop. Stop it. Dave. Get that finger away from my face or I will eat it."

Dave giggles, pokes Robert's chin again. "Your chin is hairy!"

"That's because I'm a man, you child." He laughs, tickling the boy's sides.

"An old man."

"Oh. Hello Dylan. So glad you could join us." Robert smiles. Dave climbs onto his back. "Now. Please can you puke up your sister's Masada so-"

"Mascara," she says, rolling her eyes.

"That's what I said." Robert mumbles as Dave sits on his shoulders. "Please can you puke up her eye stuff so we can all be happy families again?"

"I didn't actually eat it you moron."

"Where is it then?"

"On it's way to the dumpster, probably. I threw it in the bin."

"At least you didn't litter." Robert mutters.

Dylan smiles. Dawn groans. "I hate you!"

"Honey, I'll buy you another one." Robert sighs.

"No you won't."

"Okay, I won't." He frowns. That's new. "Dave. Get off of my shoulders."

"Make me."

"I will get the mosters from under your bed to eat you!"

"No! Daddy, no!" Dave screams, hurrying off of his father's shoulders.

"That's what I thought." He winces. "Jesus, no need to be gentle."

"No. She isn't even allowed it. Izzy gave her it." Dylan says. Are we back to the eye stuff again?

"What even is it- wait. That stuff I told you not to wear because you are still a child? Just like the lip stuff and the stuff for your face?"

"Lip stick and blusher. Yeah." Dawn mumbles.