NUMB | changlix

15

"of course I'll stay, lix that's why I'm here." as changbin pats his head gently, "I want you to get better."

"I want to be with you.." felix whispers, the words somewhat startle changbin since he didn't understand the context. "I want you...to only be by my side."

"felix." changbin pushes the boy up softly, he forces their eyes to lock and felix's doe puppy dog expression doesn't make this any better for changbin. "I'll be by your side but I'm going to need to help other people as well."

felix's hand grips onto his bed sheets, knuckles turning white after his words flow into his ears. they stay inside and stick. "only me binnie." felix lets go of the stress reliever, he puts his hands on changbin's face. specifically his cheeks, he squished them to where his lips pucker up. changbin doesn't understand the action until felix makes a move. he's pressing his lips against his, he doesn't rebel but is surprised by the act the younger has committed.

it felt somewhat..wrong. was it wrong to be kissing his patient?

was it wrong to be kissing felix?

felix parts their kiss due to them needing to breathe, he looks at changbin. his heart going mad, vision fuzzy as if his lips made him drunk. changbin showed no reaction, just wide eyes and silence. "did...you not like it?"

"I—I was just surprised.." changbin admits, avoiding the question as he didn't know how to answer it.  his emotions and thoughts were clashing, they simply weren't on the right track. there was no agreement at the moment. "but your lips are soft."

"so..you like them?" felix bats his eyes, his index finger running along his lips as the ends of his mouth form into a smile. "is it okay if I kiss you again?"

"I feel like I should say no..." changbin mumbles. felix raises a brow from his answer, his eyes trail down to the boy's silver necklace. slipping a finger into the loop, he tugs on it in order for changbin to become closer to him.

"why is that?" felix cocks his head, wanting a response immediately. his heart felt displeased, his burning desire for changbin was rising and soon would be off the notch. "you don't like me, huh?" the disappointment that drips from his voice only makes changbin feel guilty, was this his goal?

"I do like you lix." he takes a hold of the hand that pulls on his necklace, their fingers fall in between the crest of their hands and felix flinches from the action. "but I feel kissing is a bit much, don't you think?"

felix looks at their hands and nods, he was burning up. "do you...want me?"

"in what way felix?"

felix adds more force when it comes to their interlocked hands, changbin was receiving strange vibes from felix and he didn't understand why. what was he not acknowledging at the moment? "changbin...do you think you'd ever love me?"

changbin's mouth slightly drops, felix only watches as he does and the soft feeling that stirs inside him transforms into boiling anger. why was this so hard!

he harshly tugs his hand away and stands up from the bed, yelling at the boy with tears forming in his eyes. "make me normal again, you need to fix me!"

"what are you talking about?" changbin only follows the boy's actions, standing up as well to try and calm him down. "felix, you need to speak yourself so I can try and help you!"

felix's body shakes, his hands shoot up to his hair which he tugs on roughly. walking away from changbin and forming a good distance, he turns his back and states, "I can't stop thinking about you, I need help!"