Say You Loved Me

What's Wrong With (Me)?

We still got five more chapters to go, but this will be the last chapter with Mari's POV

Enjoy!

Song: I Wish You Loved Me by Tynisha Keli

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How can someone make me so sad
But still I only want you to stay
I wanna say "I love you" so bad
But I don't wanna scare you away
Please I wish that you'll understand
That I wanna be more than just your friend
I wish you loved me

I don't know where I am right now or where I'm even trying to go. I just kept driving and driving without no real destination in mind. Eventually, I gre tired and moved the car to the side of the rode before turning off the engine. I laid my head on the wheel and began to cry right there in the driver's seat.

Why did I say that to him? Why did I tell him that I didn't love him when I know for a fact that wasn't true. What is wrong with me?

Hearing him confessing to having feelings for me was everything I ever wanted and more, but with just a few words I managed to throw it all away in an instant.

I was afraid of getting hurt all over again like before. I didn't want a repeat of those feelings and the pain that came with it. Yet, it still feels like I'm experiencing that pain all over again.

"Marinette? Are you okay?" I lifted my head and Tikki was hovering above the wheel.

I shook my head, "Not exactly..."

Tikki gave a sympathetic look, "Marinette....do you really believe Adrien would lie about loving you?"

"I.....I don't know Tikki." I leaned back in my seat. "I don't believe that he would lie to me like that, but he also could be fooling himself into thinking that he feels that way. We were always such great friends....what if he decides later down the line that that's all he wants to be and finds someone else?"

"You're assuming the worst case scenarios without even thinking of all the wonderful things that could come out of being with him. You'll never know how far the jump is if you don't take a leap Marinette."

"I just don't want to get hurt again."

"Don't you think Adrien's hurting just as much as you right now?" Tikki asked. "He's the one that got rejected in the end."

She's right...in the end Adrien was the one who was completely open with his feelings and I was the one who shot him down. I'm so worried about the thought of being rejected by him, but he was the only one who was rejected.

I don't know how to fix this...I don't know if I CAN fix this or if I should. I can't change the past...I can only see where the road is going to take me from here.

~~~~~

After hours of driving trying to find my way back, I finally entered a familiar part of the city and proceeded to navigate myself the rest of the way back.

I pulled out my keys, unlocked the door and entered the apartment. Once I was inside, Alya came rushing from around the corner and attacked me with a hug.

"Girl, where the hell have you been I've been worried sick!" She frantically spoke. "Adrien said you ran off somewhere and you weren't answering your phone."

During my attempt of finding my way back into the city, my phone had died in the car and I didn't even bother to charge it. "Sorry Alya, I kind of....got lost making my way back and I didn't realize my phone had died." I stated apologetically.

Alya sighed and shook her head, "I swear you're going to give me a heart attack one of these days."

"Again I'm really sorry." I smiled nervously and yawned. "Hey, I'm put on my pajamas and head off to bed. Can we talk in the morning?"

"Wait girl, hold up." She said stopping me. "First, tell me how your day with Adrien went. You guys had fun right?"

I sighed, "I really don't want to talk about it right now..."

She frowned at my statement. "That bad?"

"I'll tell you abput it in the morning. Right now I just need some sleep..."I began to make my way to my room, but turned around to say one more thing. "Oh, and next time you and Nino want to set me up on a date. Can you do me a favorite and not be incredibly obvious about it or maybe just not do it at all?"

Alya gave a wide eyed expression, but then brushed it off acting completely innocent. "Pfft, what are you talking about Marinette? I wasn't trying to set you up, don't be ridiculous..."

I rolled my eyes, but couldn't contain my slight smile. "Goodnight Alya."

After I took a shower and put on my pajamas, I got into bed and made myself comfortable under the comforter. For a few minutes I laid there staring at the ceiling still thinking about what I said to Adrien, that I didn't love him, and how big of a lie that truly was.

I remember fantasizing about having an entire life with that man. I imagined us getting married and even designed what my wedding dress would look like. We'd go on our honeymoon to a different country or to some tropical island. We'd have three kids, two boys and a girl and we would love them so much. We'd have a dog, maybe a cat, but then again we already have Plagg, and maybe we'd get that hamster too. I don't know why I love hamsters so much.

Some say when you can picture living the rest of your life with a person, that's how you know you're in love with them.

I turned to my side and a tear falls from my eye. I do still love him so much, but it's too late now. If there was any possibility of having that future with Adrien before, I don't I'll ever get that chance again after today.

I wonder how he feels about me now....

How can someone make me so sad
But still I only want you to stay
I wanna say "I love you" so bad
But I don't wanna scare you away
Please I wish that you'll understand
That I wanna be more than just your friend
I wish you loved me

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Welp that's the end of the story thanks for reading...

If you fell for that then you are officially a silly goose.

We've got more coming.

Once again the song that inspired these past chapters is called 'I Wish You Loved Me' by Tynisha Keli

Go check it out on YouTube, Spotify or wherever you go to to listen to music.

Ciao for now!