Rapture

Clarity

The goddess holds my hand and walks with me as the woods open up before us, and I see blue.

A lake, clear surface gleaming like crystal under the moonlight. The animals drinking from it raise their heads as we arrive. A deer, a wolf, and a bear, all white and celestial like the buck we ate for dinner.

"Are they guardians like Mulha?" I ask as they bow their heads to the queen.

"Yes. They come to drink from the lake's purifying water, removing corruption from rooting within them." She answers, and the guardians scatter at a tilt of her chin.

"Can guardian spirits be corrupted?"

"Any soul can. Once you let the shadow of shame cover the truth inside you, a whole world of darkness can be birthed."

I don't understand what she means, but I am entranced by the water's clear reflection. I feel the thirst in my throat.

"And the water helps them?" I ask, and the queen nods slowly.

"The water cleans the dirt of shame, gives vision of truth."

"Why aren't more animals drinking?" I ask, and the queen laughs,

"Purity costs pain, Elena. Pain most beings can't stand. The pain of true sight upon yourself."

I gulp down my spit. "Did you bring me to drink?"

"Better than drink." She smiles at me, then leads me by the hand to the lake. Already naked, the two of us step inside.

The water take my feet in a refreshing chill.

Darkness takes my mind.

I am running. Panting. Forest floor tearing at my feet. Running. Panting. Running. Panting. Werewolves howling. Giant bats screeching.

The water-level reaches my knees and I see kicking. Ropes, and chains. Velvet and satin. Blood running down my legs.

I feel the cold touch of the water around my waist. Demons. Fangs tearing my thighs. Penetration. Humiliation. Annihilation.

Light flashing, and the king's arm impaling him on a red-hot rod from tailbone to noggin.

I stop to smile as I hear the desperate symphony of his screams at the back of my head again.

"Don't stop yet." The queen commands, her voice both close and far away, her hand tugging at mine

The chilling embrace of water takes my arms, chest and shoulders, and I feel a sudden calm. A deadly calm. I release my hand from the queen's, and lean back into the water.

I let the lake-water swallow me, let them pour in my mouth, my nostrils, my ears. I stare through the surface, seeing the moon reflecting in the water like stars across the night.

Dark purple shade creeps in twists and spirals into the sparkling blue of the water. It takes over until I'm enveloped in a void of it; grappling me into sickening comfort. I tear through the shame, and blood spatters my sight, red and bright.

Then I remember.