The Outsider- Avatar Fanfic

Chapter 32 - Promises

It was happening over and over again.

A flash of blinding light splitting the world in two, followed by a thunderous bang and then an instant vacuum of silence as Iroh fell into darkness.

Over and over again I stretched my hands out, desperate, muscles straining as I grappled with the black to catch Iroh before he fell.

Over and over again Azula smiled as she shot a bolt of cold lightning at her uncle's heart, and I was always too slow.

Over and over again, I failed.

Each time the scene reset, so did I. My mind would go blank as I stood on the dry cracked earth, surrounded by faceless bodies that I somehow knew were my friends, despite the lack of soul. They were no more than figurines. The sky was burnt, the air thick and yet empty at the same time as my lungs struggled to breathe; it was paradoxical, the entire scene. And yet over and over again my heart would race and my body shake as Azula prepared to strike. Every time I knew it was coming, but my body couldn't respond in time; no matter how much my mind shouted and screamed, I would always react a second too late. The others were hapless in their frozen state. Even Kai...

I was exhausted. I was in pain; adrenaline was constantly rising through my veins, sparking and burning. My body was racked with sobs as I desperately grasped at Iroh once again,  teeth grinding painfully together. I tasted salt as tears slipped past my lips.

Stop. Please stop.

This time will be different, I thought as the scene reset itself as Iroh fell.

This time will be different, I thought as I forced my feet to move as Azula began to smirk.

This time will be different, I thought as sparks exploded at my fingertips when I raised my outstretched hand— this time, not towards Iroh, but Azula herself.

With a silent roar I struck at the cold incandescent light as it sought to find its mark on Iroh's chest, gripping the burning entity with my white-engulfed hands. Sparks met sparks, and the pain almost made me black out as I shattered the lightning bolt into a million pieces.

It cascaded around me, lighting up the darkness with peels of thunder and suddenly, it was lashing rain. It whipped against me, striking me, angry that I had interrupted the scripted cycle. But Iroh was safe now, so I laughed in the face of the angry storm.

Lightning was born and died around me, flashes that lit up my world before plunging it into darkness—but it was nothing to the burning white light inside me. God, it was painful. It wanted to get out, in any way possible, but I didn't know how. All I could do was scream and clench my hands as the horrific feeling of burning tore through my body. The thunder got louder in my head, the thrashing storm raging all around me.

The wind was all that stopped me from falling as Iroh had done. It held me, stopping the rain from spitting at me; I was grateful. The wind had always been my friend.

But it couldn't help me as I tore myself apart. Because this whiteness, this blinding light, this boundless energy, was coming from inside me. I couldn't seperate from it, no matter how hard I tried, no matter how much it hurt...

I screamed, lips and eyes stretched far too wide, splitting my face in half. My hair caught fire, burning around me as my skin cracked and peeled, revealing the burning whiteness that was eating me from the inside out. The pain...it was unbearable.

The darkness, the flashes of light, the texture of storm clouds enclosing on my body; through it all, for a split second, I saw a boy standing on the top of a barren mountain range. He was screaming, like me. He was crying, like me. He was commanding the universe to strike him down, so he could give it all straight back. He...was asking me. The lightning was me. The white light was me. That burning, crackling energy; it was me.