Youth

#25 - Siren Song

    It was soft, gentle.  Kind.  It warmed her heart without her knowing what it was.  It made her feel happy.  Wanted.

    Then, a certain blonde woman popped back into her mind.

    [Y/n] bolted upright.

    A sound that she hadn't really registered happening came to a stop; Nyais had been humming softly, his arms wrapped around [Y/n]'s sleeping figure.  He tilted his head, brushing a strand of her hair behind her ear.

    "How do you feel?" he asked gently, holding her like she was some ancient artefact; a priceless, delicate body of ceramic.  Or, perhaps more suitably, he held her like she was the most important thing in his life - held her like she was his entire world and reason for being.

    "I don't know..." [Y/n] tailed off. "Better, but worse," she sighed, looking up at Nyais with a confused expression. Everything hurt. Her body felt like every muscle had turned to paper and ripped when she'd move. Simultaneously, all her wounds from Seishin and Kori had gone.

    "That makes sense," Nyais sighed. "You were out for a day and a half. Don't worry, though. You haven't missed anything," he smiled gently. "Rayne came back to make sure all was well and apparently you'd reacted best out of everyone he'd tried it on." He placed his hand on her head, his expression gentle and relieved. "I knew you could do it."

    "I... I don't know..." [Y/n] shook her head. "I don't know what to do. I'm... I'm not even human anymore, Nyais." Her expression seemed desperate. "I don't know... I just don't know. I'm... I'm scared..."

    "[Y/n], calm down. Nothing has changed—"

    "Everything has changed!" [Y/n] snapped, pulling away from the brunet and staring dead into his violet eyes.

    They stayed like that for a while, [Y/n]'s gaze riddled with confusion, fury, fear and so much more. Nyais simply looked sad.

    "I'm sorry, Nyais..." [Y/n] looked down, averting her eyes from his. He shook his head and pulled her close to him once more, his embrace still warm and welcoming.

    "Don't apologise," he said quietly. "There's so much to blame me for, so much to hate me for... I don't know how you stay happy around me. Every second with you is a blessing. I want to make our time together worth it, no matter how endless it may seem to you. A-and please know that it won't always be like this. You won't be stuck in this apartment for eternity, I promise. There's just a lot I need to work on right now - lots of lengths I need to go to in order to ensure your protection. You understand, right?"

    "I... I understand, but..." [Y/n] looked down. "I don't just not know anything about myself now...  I know hardly anything about you. You've been around for how long, 80 something years? I know you had a wife but you refuse to tell me anything but her name. I know you hate Rayne but all I can trace that to is his strangeness, which I'm sure can be said for a lot of vampires. I know you're friends with the king but it makes no sense how that could come to be regarding the age gap, and why is someone who apparently lives in luxury like this running a program where humans look after kids? Surely that would be taken on by someone a lot fresher than you?"

    Nyais seemed a little surprised by her outburst of questions. He sat and thought for a while.

    "It makes sense for you to be curious, but I really don't think you knowing everything about me is a good idea," he shook his head.

    "Why?" [Y/n] asked monotonously.

    "I've told you this before. I wasn't a good person. I don't want you to have to know about the shit I've done in the past." Nyais' gaze hardened and he let go of [Y/n], standing up and walking over to the door, placing his hand on the door handle. "I can't talk to you about Leya because it's too recent," Nyais began quietly, "I can't talk to you about Rayne because it's too dangerous for me to," he turned around and stared at [Y/n] with a cold expression. "I can't talk to you about Olli because he's the one with your life on a string and I can't talk to you about my job because you'd hate me if I did." With that, he opened the door and took a step out.