I Amsterdam (Completed)

Chapter 7.1 - Emma

"Step out of the history that is holding you back. Step into the new story you are willing to create."      - Oprah Winfrey

I woke up to a nightmare.

Someone was choking. I didn't know who, but the sound of their cough as they lost their air and their life was more than I could bear. I took CPR training a year ago, and I could tell the coughing was deadly when I heard their forceful, lengthy coughs grew more and more muffled, as their airway became more and more blocked, while I stood disconcerted in pitch black darkness, unknown of where they were and how to get to them, to save them. It was like hearing someone screaming for help before their mouth was gagged by a murderer, before they're dragged off to their imminent death.

All of a sudden the room filled with liquid, swirling around me and rising steadily from all sides, as if being poured into a blocked funnel, and I stood above the tube. It rose above my chest and eventually above my head so that I had to tread water to prevent myself from drowning. But from doing so, I could tell that the liquid was definitely not water; it was denser and sticky, and from the moment it spurted up to land into my mouth, I immediately identified its copper taste.

I don't think anyone has ever swam in blood before.

I am not usually phased by scary dreams. Most of the time, I find them exhilarating. But this was something different. I never woke up in a cold sweat, crying and panting, both relieved and anxious at the same time. I always thought it was just something in movies, but my nightmare had just changed those past thoughts of mine.

I glanced over to my clock, which read 5:30 AM. I switched off my set alarm for 6:30, and sat up, deciding I wanted to be awake to watch the sunrise. Part of me also says that Brandon will too.

So I guess that's another reason why I'm up so early today; I want to see him.

I didn't want to be rash or impulsive of my feelings. I've never felt something as strong as I've felt about Brandon, but I could guess what they resembled - something that I don't want to say just yet. It's funny because the reason I asked him to show me around was just the result of curiosity. Now it seems to have become something more.

But be careful, Emma, I told myself. Don't get too close. Nothing must hold you back. I decided to allow myself the confidence to think that Brandon wouldn't do anything of the sort, that I'm spending time with him just for curiosity, and that I wouldn't let our relationship become anything more than it has already.

I grabbed and opened my sketchbook to my latest sketch. It was the Mona Lisa, according to Brandon. I smiled at the thought.

I flipped the page over slowly, brainstorming what to sketch, of what properly represents the Dutch culture of Amsterdam, but my mind just kept returning to one certain image.

I said I didn't want to be rash, but I guess my wants and my actions are different.

Picturing Brandon in my mind, I began sketching.