Preciously unwanted.

CHAPTER FIVE.

One long month passed by. Jenny had managed to get a job as an accountant in a local bank, and I was a part-time waitress. We were able to get by. My shift would start at nine in the morning and end at four, this was a good arrangement because at 4:30pm going, I would go through hell. I would puke, feel dizzy, and sometimes have stomach pains. My belly had grown a little, I'll say about 0.002%. I would never leave the house after coming back from work. I didn't want to. Jenny's house was a huge one, but soon I knew every nook and cranny of it.

During this past month, I hadn't contacted anyone from my family, and neither had they contacted me. The only person I spoke to on a regular basis was my granny, I called her every week to tell her how I was, and in turn, she'd tell me how things were, back at home. Mom and dad hadn't spoken about me once, and didn't seem to care about my well being, even though Grandma said they were still angry and in shock, and I shouldn't mind their actions, it still hurt me immensely. If I were in their place, I would never do that to my child, I mean, how mad were they that even after a month, they still refused to talk to me. 

Jason had tried to call me 3 weeks after I'd left my home. I cut the call immediately. I would never talk to him again, after that horrible thing he had done to me during our last encounter. Though, there were times when I wondered, what if he called to apologize, to make amends, to want to get back together? Well, whatever. I didn't need him, I of course still loved him, but I definitely never wanted to see him again. He had hurt me so much. It was HIS child after all.

''Let's think of  baby names'' Jenny told me, slumping onto the blue sofa beside me. It was Sunday, I had gone to work but Jenny hadn't, instead she went to church and came back home with some Chinese food.

I pretended not to hear her because I didn't want to talk about the thing in my stomach, so I pretended to be interested in the BBC news on the screen. She grabbed the remote and switched of the black flat screen TV. I sighed.

''Why should we worry about naming this thing? I'll give it up for adoption anyway'' I said, resting my head on my hand, while my elbow leaned against the blue sofa. Jenny looked at me in a disappointed manner.

''But, this baby is your responsibility'' she said.

''A responsibility I don't want'' I said, looking down at my stomach. I imagined a little boy or girl developing slowly in my stomach, but unlike most people, this thought didn't give me pleasure. It gave me annoyance, anger, frustration.

''Sometimes, life gives us responsibilities we don't want. It can be very hard to accept, especially if those responsibilities affect our lives in very unpleasant ways, but we can't ignore these responsibilities, it's just not right. If you give this baby up, and it gets adopted, somewhere along the line, his or her adoptive parents will tell the child the truth, and don't you think they'll hate their mother for leaving them? Don't you think the'd get hurt?'' Jenny asked with her big, hazel eyes gazing straight into my plain gray eyes. 

''I don't know. Let me see the names you got'' I said, as Jenny clapped her hands in excitement and passed me a piece of paper with a list:

BOY NAMES.                                                                                                                          GIRL NAMES.

Christopher.                                                                                                                             Suzanne.

Mark.                                                                                                                                             Devona.