The Line | seaycee au

The Argument

a speech for a dance class Kaycee taught (2017)
dancers: Give us a speech!
kaycee: Haha, okay fine. This song is pretty special to me, because it's about finally getting out of a toxic relationship. I, personally, have been in just a couple of relationships, which have almost always ended with me crying and wondering what I did wrong. But reflecting on these relationships, I've realized that that's exactly how the victims of toxic relationships are made to feel every day. I was constantly made to feel like I wasn't good enough, and when I'd finally get the courage to fight back, I was suddenly the bad guy. The person who blamed themselves. I know this may not apply to a lot of you, but for the few who have experienced this or are continuing to experience it now- please know your worth. Know that you are beautiful and strong and brave, and if your partner turns those traits against you to manipulate you, then they are not, and will never be, worth your time. Honestly. Looking at each and every one of your gorgeous faces, I know for a fact you all deserve the world. Give this dance your all, and give those toxic partners the finger!

••

Kaycee Rice doesn't have a back-bone.

Over the course of the last 12 hours, she had definitely figured that out the hard way.

She sat in bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering why she advocated so much for people in toxic relationships to get out when she couldn't even follow her own advice. Why had she called Gabe last night? Why had she agreed to get back together?

Why couldn't she seem to think of any positives for this outcome?

With a sad breath, she rolled onto her side, looking out of her window at the city outside. She had been in bed for hours now, and the sun was already high in the sky, shining down on the abundance of people going about their day. The ghost of a smile occupied her face, soon turning into a frown. That should be her, running around town with Tahani before rehearsal today, drinking an iced coffee from Starbucks and trying on outrageous outfits from the clothes stores lining the city. That should be her, enjoying herself and laughing and forgetting all about her ex and his stupid face.

But then she apologized to Gabe, and they got back together, and the immediate feeling of regret kept her rooted in her bed.

She couldn't even tell you why she did it. He's a Grade-A piece of shit, came Sean's voice in her head. I figured that out, came her own voice in agreement. She had agreed with him, and actually believed it.

Hypocrite, she scolded herself.

Her stomach seemed to sink the more she thought about it, so she reached for her phone and rang Tahani. She picked up on the first ring.

"Kayc? I thought you were sick, what's up?"

Something about the concern in her voice made her eyes well up with tears. Oh yeah, she may have lied to Tahani as well. She really is a monster, isn't she? Blinking rapidly, she clears her throat. "Yeah, I, uh... no. I'm not sick"

Silence. The girl on the other line didn't say anything for a moment. "You got back with him, didn't you?"

"Fuck, I know, don't yell at me" Kaycee said quickly, her voice cracking a bit. "I know it was stupid and I don't know why I did it but I can't go back on it now and I don't know what to-"

"Shush. Breathe. Stop freaking out for a second. I'll be there in 5"

And in an instant, she had hung up. Kaycee allowed herself to breathe, focusing her thoughts on that rather than Gabe. And what Sean would say when he found out.