PULSE

PART IV - INTRAVENOUS

Where to go from here?

Anytime Black thought about his mother it took him out for a couple of days, not to mention he'd gone out of his way to be there for Elle. Women often mistook kindness for interest - especially coming from him. What was the alternative? She seemed like a decent enough person to him - definitely undeserving of getting taken advantaged of. Aside from that he could tell whatever it was it was deep and hurt her a lot.

Elle's lifestyle had blessed her with the superpower of evading hangovers. She'd become practically liquor intolerant from all of her partying. But thats what alcohol had always been used for - to heighten the highs. She'd outdone herself last night. A whole bottle of tequila if her recollection served her right - and a whole lot of embarrassing. She'd managed to keep the tears away using her happy liquor but that didn't negate the fact that it was clearly obvious she was in crisis. She never wanted to be a. victim, she never allowed herself to be. The realist side of her and the human side of her were at war and the realest needed to take over. The verdict had been read aloud and there was nothing that could change it, as nice as justice would feel it could never fully right the wrong or fill the void it caused.

It wouldn't change the fact that her relationship with her mother was now estranged. She'd been civil during the trial but now even a simple hello seemed too much. If she never saw her stepfather Alan again it would be too soon. They'd failed her. All of the values and ideals instilled gone for the promise of prestige, money and advancement. People seldom want to be like their parents and Elle was joining that majority.

Fuck them forever.

Unfortunately that means full independence, no contact and no support. It wouldn't be hard at all had Jesse still been here but he's gone.

Elle swallows knocking on Tre's door with a gift card for gas, a detailing voucher and wet wipes neatly put into a male travelling bag. It's how she was raised to apologize. She'd been a first class nuisance and he'd pitied her enough to deal with it and be caring.

"Hey" he looks her over.

"Sorry about last night" she comments passing him the bag and he looks her over eyes stopping at her bandaged foot in a pair of slides - that didn't seem like her style.

"You said a lot of fucked up stuff" Tre comments making her cringe.

"Just because I'm a spoiled little rich girl doesn't mean I like talking about my feelings. Whoa is me." Elles starts shocks him as she leans in the doorway showing no more signs of weakness.

"You asked me to kill you" Tre continues and she nods in embarrassment.

"I'm not suicidal, just mean. If I died maybe things wouldn't be so blasé" Elle sighed shaking her head. "At least thats how I think"

"If you died instead of who?"

"My best friend" Elle sighs not being specific enough. Jesse had been her whole world. Her best friend in every sense of the word, thicker than thieves and close enough that they could finish each others sentences. "Anyway, I just wanted to say sorry and thanks for looking out" Elle offered a smile. Like Rico said in paid in full 'people die everyday B'. Jesse kept life real, he'd been a designer - he was her best friend and she was his muse. When Alan and her mother threatened to cut her off for not going to college, Jesse spent his inheritance on a warehouse. They lived there throwing parties to cover the rent while Jesse made clothes and shoes for the theatres productions. When the money started rolling in Elle staged the place and they had a modern-day speakeasy they named Prohibition. It was their bread and butter but now, Elle couldn't bring herself to step foot in the club.

She'd cried for a month straight after Jesse was found. dead, the nightmare was reality which triggered insomnia and then eventually mania and depression. Everything made worse by Alan taking the case to defend Jesse's murderer - even knowing how it affected Elle; who he claimed to be is own flesh and blood.

"I don't need gas money" Tre said looking at the card.

"Tre you don't always have to be in need to get things" She commented getting a look. "Black" she corrects with a smile. He checked his phone as it buzzes looking down the stairs at the front door. Another girl in his rotation.

"I'm headed out, I can let her up" Elle adds.

"Cool" he agreed uneasily. He'd been open with her, he'd cared for her, they'd been spending time together. Usually a recipe for disaster. She'd been a mess the past two days but now she was okay and not jealous as far as he could tell - that was new.

...

Kizzy didn't know what to make of Elle as they shopped around like her life wasn't completely upside down. Elle had never really been a complainer but under the current circumstances she felt like it was justified. Jesse and Elle had lived in their own world - literally. The Prohibition had been their own little microcosm; Elle was the Queen and Jesse was like her most trusted advisor. Elle had become the party, or so Kizzy had heard - they had grown into different people. She'd only been to the prohibition once a three day party and she'd been treated like royalty. They didn't stop laughing. Elle had been a more quiet kid, always tenacious but reserved and always watching. Jesse's Elle was practically a show girl. The kind of person that lights up a room.

The family had it all wrong - no one believed Elle and Jesses relationship was platonic. With their partying lifestyle Em, Elles mom thought it was some sort of open relationship - or that Jesse loved Elle as more than friends but her daughter didn't reciprocate.

But now Jesse was dead, killed, rather murdered by the husband of his girlfriend. As far as Kizzy could tell the man that did it had killed a part of Elle too.

Yet, here she was filling up her cart with make up after they'd visited the car dealership.

"Elle are you sure you don't want to talk about what happened?" She asks worried.

"I'm not the only person who's lost someone"

"Doesn't mean you can't grieve. If you don't want to talk about Jesse fine but what about your mom? That can't be easy"

How could Elle for get her moms position in all this? Standing beside her husband.

She tolerated Jesse but she never liked him and now she was on the side of justifying his murder as a crime of passion when the facts to support that were concocted.

"What mom?"

"Elle, your mom and you were always close its a double loss" Kizz reasons.

"Kizz I'm tired of crying, nothing can fill the Jesse sized hole. I'm not violent but I'd fight mom and Alan in a second for what they've done. I don't think revenge is what you had in mind for my rehabilitation Kizz" Elle smiles.

"So you're just going to stay here and do what?" Kizz asks.

"I got dressed up last night, one of the costumes Jesse made me, some shoes that he hadn't finished and a faux fur. It felt good. Minus the foot damage." Elle says taking her for out of the ugg boots she's opted to walk around in despite it being summer.

"Elle?!" Kizzy sheiks.

"It's alright" Elle smiles.

"What did the doctor that bandaged it say?"

"It wasn't a doctor it was Mr. Asshole"

"What?"

"Yeah, he took pity on me and I was out of it"

"Elle, please call me when shit hits the fan, thats what family is for. If you don't want to talk that fine but you don't know how things work here. And, it'd hurt me if something happened to you" Kizz says honestly worries and letting it show.

"Alright, Kizzy" Elle smiles kissing her cheek and giving her a hug.

"Live a full life for me Ellara" had been Jesses last words and she would find a way to honour that.