The mortal guardian (Loki x Reader)

Ch 9: Mom..?

{(Y/N)}
"Donnie, wake up! Please."

Mommy...?

My eyes flutter open. "Mom.." "Miss? You're awake! what happened?" He places a warm hand against my forehead. "You spoke through your slumber, though I couldn't understand, " he smiled. "I'm just glad that you are unharmed."
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We sit in the main room, laughter resounding through the walls as jokes and fond memories are retold. Meanwhile, all I can seem to do is bite my nails. Mom hated the habit, but I can't seem to stop. "Hey Don, what's on your mind? Look like you saw ghosts." "Huh?" My head shot up, searching for the origin of my distraction. Tony's chuckle catches me off guard. "I-I guess my mind just wandered off on me. It won't happen ag-" "no need to apologize for it, kiddo. The only time it'll mean anything is if you lose track of Reindeer games." Another round of smiles and laughter, and I can't help but feel a shy grin tug at my lips.

"Yikes. You all had such scary experiences...but I can't really relate. My life has just been average besides meeting you guys. Meeting Loki nonetheless." "Well, what's your story?" Bruce leans closer. Thor stretches a bit, standing. "As much as I'd love to hear more, I am absolutely parched. I shall return in a moment." Steve nods at me while holding his head in the palm of his hand. "Yeah. What're some things that you've been through?" They seem to ignore Thor as he leaves and I become a bit uneasy. "Well..." I look around at the other Avengers. "Some things I remember are taking meds, being sick a lot, and going to school. Never had many friends though.." I fidget. "My mom had her waves of anger. Not abusive, just angry. But that was because dad left four months before I was born." I chuckle a bit as a memory finds its way through my head. "She once got mad at me for sleeping too loudly. This was one of the nights she had first started locking my bedroom door at night. She had trouble sleeping that night, and could only hear me snoring. The next morning, when I woke up, there was duct tape on my mouth and my mom was still asleep." I laugh at the memory. Looking back at the others and seeing that they weren't smiling, I feel a bit dumb. "...how often were you locked in your room?" "Every night. I had snuck outside to play and ended up getting sick, so my mom put a lock on my door. Then whenever I misbehaved, I was locked in. But it's main use was to make sure I was safe." Bruce looked at me. "...is something wrong? You seem uncomfortable." "I'm fine. Just..." Sigh. "Mom doesn't like me talking about this stuff." I stare at the floor again. "She cares about me. Sure, she might've had a funny way of showing it. But she protected me. People would've hurt me, bullied me, treated me like a monster." "Why would they do that? You seem nice enough." Natasha sits back against her chair. "I just...I made some mistakes in my childhood. But besides that, no one would have cared for me as she did. Carrying her around is a bit awkward, but I put up with it because...well, she's family. She..." I stopped mid-thought. I made a sad, scrunched up face. "Hey, what's wrong?" Steve reaches out to touch my arm, only touching air as I stand. "...I- uh, I'll be back." I hurriedly walk out of the room.

Nice going, moron. They think you're crazy. Just like everyone else.

"Miss Charm? Is all well with you?" Thor's booming voice swims through the air behind me. "Yep. Everything fine. I just figured I'd get back to my job. I'll come back down in a bit." Before that same booming voice could respond, I'm off once again. Finally have a good job, finally have a fresh start and I ruin that too. As I make my way back however, a thought pops into my brain. A mental weed. My mother is family.

But would she have done the same for me?

Nausea crashes over me and I swallow down my pain as I walk. All that passes through my skull is the same heart-numbing question. She didn't care. She cared the most, but that didn't mean she cared much. I take some deep breaths. I'm still her caretaker. She might have passed, but she's probably looking down at me and smiling. She loved me...right? Tears threaten to prick at my eyes. Don't cry, he can use it against you.

Ding

I step out, making my way down the hall. Why is it so cold...? Nevermind that. Focus, Donnie. I type the pin. The voice in my head tells me to go back. Tells me to keep myself occupied. Maybe if I light the candle I- wait. Wait wait wait. My eyes widen ever so slightly as the doors open in front of me. Don't look at him. I start walking. Act strong. Don't look. "You aren't nearly as strong as you try acting, my dear nuisance. So why bother?" Tat tat tat. The soft echoes following my feet stopped for what seemed like forever. Why should I stop here? "Because you don't know what your answer is. Of course, why would you." My skin turns colder. I turn on my heel, slowly and almost aimlessly wandering near his glass box. "Does this mean you read minds, oh mighty pain in my ass?" "Why, yes it does! Look who guessed it?" His arms crossed over his chest. I sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose. "I'm not gonna stand here and talk to some snotty, overpowered brat with no respect. Unless you can tell me something I don't already know, or raise the dead, I'm not interested. Okay?" I look back up at him, still numb and on the verge of breaking simultaneously. He must be seen my streaked face. There was a heavy silence surrounding us.

I twist, starting what felt like an unchartered trek across the world. Until...

"I didn't mean it."