You Should Have Been Here Yesterday

It's One of Those Days

I sat down in the most remote hallway, bringing my knees to my chest and leaning my back against the wall. I rest my forehead in my knees, and ignore my tears.

I hear someone's footsteps. They grow quicker and closer when they see me. "Uh, Gin?"

I don't look. Maybe he'll think I'm asleep or something. The last thing I wanna do is talk to him.

He sits down next to me. Too close. Much too close. "Gin," he repeats softly. Softly, like sweetly. In a comforting way. It almost made me look up. Almost. I sniffle involuntarily. "No," he mutters to himself. His hand hovers above my shoulder for a second before he hesitantly puts it down. I slide away. It was a nice gesture, and I did kinda appreciate it, but... That comment he made. "C'mon, don't," he says.

"What," I mumbled.

"Don't... cry..." he sounds really uncomfortable. Really. Uncomfortable.

"I'm not," I say.

"Fine," he replies.

"What do you want?" I ask, but it sounds more like go away than anything else.

"I dunno... You left your bag in the room," he says. Slowly, I raise me head. My bag is leaning against his leg. His face is really red. He almost looks scared when he sees my face. I'm not crying, okay?

Nah, wait. I am. Dammit. This is seriously the last thing I want.

"Hey, look, I'm sorry," Steve says, looking like he feels bad to see me like this. "I didn't know that would like... Make you leave."

"It's not that," I say.

"Then what is it?" he asks, almost sounding annoyed.

"Like I'd tell you," I scoff. Honestly, he's trying to be friendly. But I don't wanna tell him about this. Joey and Mick don't even know. Nobody does.

"Fine," Steve says again, a little harsher than last time. I shake me head again and put my forehead back on my knees. Not even two minutes later, the bell rings signaling the next class. I stand up, having no intention of attending this class. Steve stands too. But he doesn't leave. He walks by my side. God, really? "Why don't you like me, anyways?" he asks.

I roll my eyes. "Please," I say, ridiculing him, but still pissed and really upset. Why did it have to happen to me?

"Okay," Steve says, "why d'you hate me then?"

I look at him. And he stares back at me with this pity in his eyes. Oh god, he's staring at my tear-stained cheeks. I wonder if my makeup smeared... Do I look like at idiot?

Aw, who cares?

This whole day has been shit.

"What makes you think I hate you?" I ask, sounding more hurt than I was hoping to let on.

"I dunno," Steve says sarcastically, clearly taking my hurt tone as more of a snap of annoyance... because I guess they sound... similar. "You told me to leave you alone, that you don't like me, and-oh yeah! You tried to send me to fuckin' jail!"

"I said I didn't do that!" I yell.

"So?" Steve demands. "You can say a lotta things!"

"Go away," I said.

"No." And so we continue on, in an angered silence. I try to storm away from him, but he keeps up with my pace. I burst through the doors and out onto the front steps of the school. Steve follows me. "I told you you hate me," Steve notes.