Carrissa Ortega, a 25-year-old who's been through more trauma than most people, struggles to hold onto her sanity. She's always treated differently because she acts differently than many people. Until she finds a group of people who can relate deepl...
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"Abdu!" I hugged him as ushered him into the house.
"Hey, Carissa," he smiled. "How have you been? It's been a while and I was starting to get worried."
He followed me into the kitchen, and I poured some chamomile tea into some cups for us. I didn't really want to answer his question. The truth was, I was anything but okay.
"I've been okay. How have you been?" I tried to change the subject to him.
His dark brown eyes examined me carefully. He knew me well enough to know when I was lying.
"I have been good. Been workin' a lot at the tire shop. I went to the coast the other day."
"Gotta love that working life," I laughed nervously, "whatchu do on the coast?"
He smiled. He had a nice smile that would brighten anyone's day. His charming features were one of the first things I noticed about him when we first met.
"I met up with some friends, we went scuba diving then had some drinks on the beach. It was a fun time."
"Sounds fun. I have never been scuba diving. It always looks so peaceful, to be underwater with all the marine life," I wondered off into thought.
Images flooding my head of how it would be to spend moments underwater. The silence of the water, the majestic feeling of seeing marine life.
"I can take you some time?" he offered.
"Oh. Nah, it's okay. I won't have the time or money for a while," I got up and walked over to him.
"We can make time," he said in a deeper voice.
The tone of his voice sent chills down my back; it always was a turn on for me when his voice got deeper. He gazed up at me with those brown eyes. I touched his cheek where he had a scar.
"Do you want to go smoke a bowl?" I whispered.
"With you? Always!" he smirked.
I turned around running up the stairs, giggling as he followed closely. He was the closest person to me, more so than my best friend. My relationship was always complicated though. I closed the door behind us and filled up my pipe again. We smoked, passing it back and forth.
"You sure you're doing okay?" Abdu asked, concern lacing his voice as he exhaled smoke.
The smoke drifted towards the window as it was still open.
"Yeah, yeah. I have just been working and hanging around home," I partially lied.
"I can tell when you're lying Carissa. I can also tell when you're not okay," he wrapped his arm my waist while his other hand gently pushed my chin, so I'd have to look into his eyes.
Fuck. I couldn't lie while looking him in the eye this close.
"I-uhm." I cleared my throat. "I have just been down lately. Working almost every day, never getting anywhere."
I tried to turn my head to look at the ground, but he held my chin in place. I couldn't help but notice the warmth from his fingers radiating into my skin.
"Babe. You will get somewhere someday. Your hard work will pay off eventually. You just got to stay positive, stop those negative thoughts from getting to you so much..." he trialed off.
His gaze felt like he was digging deep into my soul. I knew he was right, but his words did little to make me feel better.
"Okay," I croaked out.
"You will have a better life soon. Just be patient," his fingered brushed against my cheek sending heat through each particle in the skin.
"I am trying my best," my throat stung as I fought back tears.
I leaned in and laid my head against his shoulder, hugging him. His arms wrapped around me tightly. My body instantly feeling so warm. I didn't realize I had been so cold before. He kissed the top of my head, making my stomach turn with butterflies. He was always so affectionate, and it was one of the things I loved about him.
"Hey," he whispered, cupping my cheek with his hand to bring my gaze to his, "as long as I am here, I will always be here to help you through everything. Anything."
He leaned in, pausing to get the signal it was okay to kiss me. He always waited for permission. I closed the distance, my lips meetings his big, warm, soft lips. The tingling sensation spread through my body as I deepened the kiss. Climbing onto his lap and straddling him.
His hands ran up and down my body, exploring it as they left trails of fire behind them. I ran my hand through his hair, pulling it as I trailed kisses down his neck. Biting his shoulder as he let out a hiss. He picked me up and pulled me underneath him. Grinding his body against mine.
I pulled his shirt over his head, staring and absorbing all the tattoos he had all over his body. They were all satanic symbols and prayers. Beautiful intricate writing and art on his sexy muscles. He pulled my shirt off trailing kissing down my stomach. It gave me tingles and butterflies until he got too low. My chest started tightening and I started having difficulty breathing. I couldn't focus, couldn't think.
"Baby..." I heard him faintly as his face appeared in my vision. "Baby, relax. It's just me. I'm right here. You're safe," he repeated to me.
I closed my eyes. Inhaling deeply, exhaling. Inhaling deeply, exhaling. Opened my eyes again to see Abdu's worried face.
"I'm sorry," I whispered.
This happened every time. He was used to it by now, but I always felt bad. Our relationship was stuck because I was stuck.
