Our Hope • Ava Rose Mikaelson

22. Ashes to Ashes

We were all near the orchard and I haven't been able to get in touch with Damon because I lost my phone somewhere between the compound and the bayou. It's been super quiet between Nik and me. I can feel him staring at me but each time I look at him he looks away as if he physically can't look me in the eyes. Dahlia is nearby setting up the spell to link herself to Nik. I'm with Hope and I had her in the car seat with a blanket covering her because it was super cold out here especially for her.

Another fifteen minutes had passed without a word and I was keeping Hope entertained. I took her out of the car seat and wrapped her in a blanket. It was a thin blanket and I could tell she was still cold by how red her nose was turning. I didn't have anything with me. Not a jacket or anything but Nik did so he gave me his for her but no words were exchanged. It was like that for a while.

"Ava?" He spoke up but I ignored him. "Ava?"

"I don't want to hear it, okay?" I said and I'm trying so hard not to yell or get angry. "Nothing you say will ever make it okay."

"Love, you have to understand..."

"Understand? I don't have to understand anything. You killed her." I told him and tears started flooding my eyes but I refuse to let them fall. "Tell me, did you know it was her? Or did you kill her without knowing? Did you think it was another werewolf? Did you even know it was her?"

He looks at me without breaking eye contact, not saying a word. "Ava..."

"Did you?!" I shouted and I didn't mean to sound loud and I startled Hope so I gently bounced her in my arms and I could feel her falling asleep when she laid her head on my shoulder.

"I did." He whispered. "I knew it was her."

This only seems to fuel my anger. I had hope... this smidge of hope that he didn't know it was her, that he was just killing anyone who attacked him and that Hayley had been one of the unfortunate ones that tried to fight him but that wasn't the case. He killed her and he knew who it was. Was this a part of his plan?

"Was this part of your plan?" I spoke my thoughts. "Killing her? Was this part of your grand plan?"

The silence that came from him was good enough for me.

"Why was killing her in part of your plan in the first place? How does her death benefit you? And Gia? What about her? She did nothing to you."

"I admit, I did plan to kill Gia." He confessed and I scoffed in disbelief. "You told me not to do anything to Elijah and I didn't... but I never said anything about the girl he was messing around with. I thought it was a good enough punishment for kissing you."

I shook my head, trying to understand him but I couldn't. Did he want to punish me too?

"So what? Did you kill Hayley for that reason too? For not telling you he kissed me. Is that your 'punishment' for me?" I asked and he looks confused for a moment until he realized what I was saying.

"What? No." He shook his head and rubbed his hand over his face, clearly frustrated. "I didn't kill her to punish you. I've never tried or even thought about punishing you because we... it's not something I would do to you."

"Then why did you kill her?" I said as my voice raised and I was trying not to get Dahlia's attention since she was nearby.

"Because I had to! I had no choice!" He said, a little too harshly, that Hope wakes up crying so I put her back in her car seat, giving her a bottle in which she calms down and slowly drifts off to sleep. I turned around to see Nik standing in front of me. "Ava... I'm sorry."

"I don't care." I said as I tried to get past him but he didn't let me. "Nothing you say can fix this."

"Kiss me."