Joseph x Cesar fluff

Story#2: Back home

So this was inspired by an edit my friend made of Joseph and Cesar and after realising what it was about my heart shattered. This is gonna be sad and a little angsty. Prepare to hurt.

Whenever he was by himself, Joseph would always look to the warm sun, broken hearted and sore from the trauma of losing his friend and possible lover.

It hurt like crazy, a maddening ache from his chest that wouldn't go away.

Why? Why hadn't he been quicker?
How could he fail Cesar like that?

Tears and dizzying headaches left him in a spiral down to the depths of darkness. He couldn't pull himself out. The only thing that soothed him was the warmth of the sun, or a cup of strong wine. Choked cries of pain and anguish swallowed him like a hungry ocean, relentless and unforgiving. All he could do was wish for it to go away, wish he had done better, wish for Cesar to magically come back.
But he never did.

Joseph cried and pleaded, why Cesar? No amount of crying could stifle the pain and it drove him to an unstable emotional state. He was either grief stricken and pained, or numb to the world without a care.

No matter what, the feelings would thaw the numbness and come creeping back in to stab him in the heart.

Joseph decided to go back to Venizia to visit Cesar's grave once more.

Upon arrival, his eyes betrayed him as tear after tear fell. He didn't care as he walked through the streets, a fleeting sun shining on his back as he made his way to Cesar's resting place. Long after the sun had said goodbye, Joseph finally found himself by Cesar's tombstone, and his knees failed him, leaving him in the dirt.

A soft breeze cradled Joseph as he sat with Cesar, twiddling a stray daisy between his fingers. A frown rested on his face and his skin flushed from crying so hard.

" . . .I'm sorry Cesar, you deserved a better partner than me . . ."

Drip. Drop. The rain started to fall, mixing with Joseph's tears as he erupted like a volcano of pain and grief. He hugged the stone, wishing the cold stone would turn into the soft and warm flesh of the person he missed most.

Come back Cesar, I'm so sorry. . !

====

The birds chirped softly outside, a warm breeze drifted about the room and brought the scent of flowers with it. A soft sun shone on the sleeping boy, as another ran their hands through his hair delicately. Warm was all they felt, at ease and completely whole. Joseph woke to the sensation of fingers running through his hair and his tears gone.

A purple and yellow bandana hung before his eyes, and upon looking up, he was met with a kind smile framed by beautiful blonde locks of untamed hair.

Cesar?

Joseph teared up once again, hugging Cesar oh so tightly, he felt so real and warm, Joseph was at ease.

" . . You Idiot, why were you crying? Did you stub your little pinky toe?" Cesar continued to caress his head lovingly. Joseph wept with happiness.

"Cesar. . . I-I love you, I'm . . . so s-sorry. . . I wasn't able to-"

Cesar sighed, cupping Joseph's face and bringing him up to look into his eyes.
"You ass. . . You made me wait so long. . ." Now it was Cesar's turn to cry, smiling lovingly at the brunette. They hugged, holding each other as if the other would break at the slightest harsh move. They stayed like that, embraced in the warm sunlight and surrounded by nothing but pleasantry.

After hours, Joseph had the feeling creep in of him having to leave soon, he felt sad he had to go.

"Joseph"
Cesar wiped and kissed Joseph's tears away gently, pressing his forehead against Joseph's.
"No more crying, no more regret. It's time for you to go. . . . But I'll always wait for you. . ."

Like slow motion, Joseph was dragged away from Cesar, the picturesque room fading away from him slowly and he cried out

"Cesar. . ! I love you!"

His voice echoed and he felt himself being brought back to consciousness.
Everything faded to black. . .
.
.
.
"I love you too, Jojo"

——
Fuck I cried so hard writing this, my throat is sore :(
Is it sad that I'm genuinely grieving over their deaths?