Chapter Four-Jade

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Hello, Lovelies, 

I hope you are all having a great Monday.  Thank you so much for reading Splendid Secrets.  I truly appreciate that you take time out of your day to read my books.  You are all wonderful.  

News: I am still self-editing Sparked.  I will be finished by the beginning of the year.  I have also started uploading Faded (Book 2) The Jaded Minds Series.  

I hope you like this chapter.  If you do votes and comments are appreciated.  If you have any questions, comment or send me a message.

-XXXX Amanda 

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Life was complicated. I knew that as I sat with my back to the bathroom door while Macon, the man I loved but who did not love me held our son. The mixture of pain and love broke the pieces of my heart into smaller pieces.

I squeezed my eyes shut, hating that I couldn't simply get over my feelings for him. If anything they grew and grew without any sign of stopping. Tears fell down my cheeks as I wondered how many I had left. Every single one of them had been for him. Worse, I realized there would be more.

I took a deep breath, hoping I could calm down before having to face him again. My bottom lip trembled as I rose from the floor and moved toward the sink, turning on the faucet before cupping my hand under the cold water and splashing my face. I raised my head and stared into the mirror, watching the glistening droplets of water slide down my face.

A knock at the door, caused me to straighten, "Jade, are you alright?" My grandfather asked and I sighed, hating that he was once again worried for me.

I took a deep breath, steadying my voice, "I'm fine."

"I've decided Macon and his friends can stay with us instead of the hotel," he said, causing my eyes to widen.

I dried my face and opened the door, shaking my head, "Why would you-"

My grandfather put up one gnarled hand, "Because he's Noah's father and the other men are your friends," he said, raising his brows, "One of them was shot protecting you."

"You do know Macon pointed a gun at Laura today, right?" I asked, raising my brows.

My grandfather surprised me by smirking, "Laura is a tough girl," he said, chuckling, "I'm sure she's okay."

I blinked in shock. Was he out of his mind? I had no doubt Macon would have shot and killed her if I hadn't revealed myself.

"Get the two guest rooms ready for them," he said, his lips twitching as my mouth dropped open. I stomped toward the living room and narrowed my eyes at Macon who glanced up from our son sleeping in his arms and smirked because somehow, he had convinced my grandfather he was worthy to stay under our roof. He had somehow figured out how to be near me which was exactly what he wanted. Worse, because this was my grandfather's home, there was nothing I could do about it.

"Your grandfather said that we're staying here," he said, smiling, "And you'll be nice enough to get our rooms together."

"You know what, Macon?" I said, raising my chin, "Get your own room ready."

I flipped him off and walked toward my room and slammed the door.

***********

I was furious but I had to calm down for Noah. My hand moved to my chest, taking a deep breath and walking back into the living room narrowing my eyes on Macon as I moved toward him.

"I need to feed Noah," I said as he watched me carefully before nodding.

"We need to talk, Jade," he said, his voice deep as his eyes moved over me.

"You may have found a way into my home," I said, raising my chin, "But don't think I am going to speak to you any more than I have to."

A frown moved over his face, "I want-"

I straightened, "I don't give a damn what you want," I said, glancing at our son, "I care about Noah and what he wants and needs. He is who is important. Not you."

He winced but he glanced down at our son and nodded, "I'm going to sign the birth certificate."

I pursed my lips to keep from saying anything I would regret later and simply nodded as I bent to take Noah from his arms before moving toward my room. Macon followed close behind me.

I sat down in the rocking chair my grandfather had made for me and glared at him, "Get out," I said through clenched teeth, "I told you I have to feed Noah."
He shrugged, "Then, feed him but you aren't going to ignore me, Jade."

"I breastfeed," I said, narrowing my eyes.

"So, it's nothing I haven't seen," he smirked, making me want to slap him.

"I don't want you here," I said, grinding my teeth.

He narrowed his eyes, moving quickly, leaning over and caging me in. His eyes moved over my face, taking in every inch before meeting my eyes, that determination I was so used to shining within them.

When he spoke his voice was low, "You're not pushing me out of your life, Jade."

He was too close and there was nowhere I could go. My face reddened wishing he would back away and I said the only thing I could think in that moment, "You mean like you pushed me out of yours."

His eyes turned more green than brown as he swallowed but he didn't move, instead, he leaned closer to me, "I did that to protect you."

Pain sliced through me because it would always come back to one thing, "I know because of the promise," I said, raising my chin, "You can take that promise and go fuck yourself with it."

He flinched as if I had slapped him but he didn't move, "You'll find out soon that this has nothing to do with my promise to Jo. It hasn't been for a while."

He moved forward and kissed me. For a moment, I lost myself in it. For a moment, I could pretend he loved me until Noah moved against me, reminding me of the heartache I had suffered when Macon told me that he wasn't in love with me. I couldn't fall into that delusion again...Not when I needed to be a mother to him.

I raised my hand and pushed Macon's chest, turning my head. He backed away, giving me the space I needed.

"Don't kiss me again," I said, refusing to look at him because I would give in. I knew I would because I loved him too damned much not to.

"It's going to happen again, Jade," he said, his voice trembling, "Whether you believe it or not, nothing between us has been about that promise to Jo for a long time. I told you what I did to protect you. I love you. I have loved you probably from the beginning and I'm going to prove that to you."

Then, he left closing the door behind him as the tears that seemed to be my constant companions fell down my cheeks once more. I had wanted to hear those words from him once upon a time but now, I couldn't believe them. I glanced down at Noah, his eyes were open staring at me as his bottom lip trembled.

I touched his cheek, "It's okay, Noah," I whispered, my voice choked, "I'm not falling for it again. You're going to be the only man in my life."

Even as I said it, I knew better than to make those words a promise because Macon was my weakness and my love for him had never died.


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