Daughter of Night (A Daughter of Nyx novel)

Chapter Twelve

The ride back was silent. She couldn't begin to know what was going on in his mind and there was no way she was going to tell him how she felt. Not when she didn't understand it herself. And certainly not with the way he held himself back from revealing anything about his past.

Trust was a two-way street and while hers had been badly damaged, his didn't seem to exist at all.

But maybe it did, in a way. She was living in his home. He wasn't taking her memories.

Memories.

"So, Bianca knows what you are." She looked at him and once again, the streetlights showed her his smile.

"Absolutely not."

"How do you keep that from happening?"

"Every time I take her home is the first, for her."

Memories.

"Is that what you are going to do with me? When this is over, are you going to take my memories?"

He was silent for so long, she didn't think she he was going to answer the question. Another to add to the list. Without looking at her, he reached over and took her hand.

"I wanted to. I knew it would be for the best. But you... your situation isn't at all like mine and Bianca's."

A spear of that jealousy that she told Nikolas about hit her but she kept quiet.

"I don't know, I mean, you could have done that to me, and I would be none the wiser, would I?"

He glanced at her and of course, there was no light at that moment to tell her what it was.

"I give you my word that I haven't put my teeth in you."

She smiled before forcing it away. She wouldn't be friends with the vampires.

"But as for your memories, it's too late. The more there are of them, the harder it is to have you forget. They become a part of you, part of who you are."

"Why didn't you?"

"I can't answer that."

She sighed and he laughed.

"It's not that I don't want to tell you, Chevonne. It's that I can't. I don't know how."

Leaning her head back, she sat back up as soon as she realized what she was doing. Don't fall asleep. Thinking about that, he was also angry that she kissed him back. They did so much more than kiss...

She didn't want to know what that was going to cost her.

"How did she not have..."

"Our saliva has healing properties. What you saw was the immediate effects. The holes closed." Her fingers twitched and his tightened and somehow, she took comfort from that. "What you didn't see, is that over a small amount of time, the bruising and soreness also fade."

It was her turn to be silent for so long, she wondered if she could speak again.

Finally, she took a breath and asked the most important question of all.

"So, you don't have to kill?"

"Why do you do this? Why do you ask questions you know you are not going to like the answer to?"

"Who likes that word now?" She faked the bravado that was in her voice, but it got a smile anyway. "My life is in your hands, Elliot and I know nothing about you. Sometimes the questions are simply for my sanity."

"No, I don't have to kill. Not now. But I can't lie and say there isn't a rush that comes from death."

She shivered in the heat of the car. He was right. Like usual.