Olivia's Crazy Life - An SVU parody fic

Dumping Dickie

2 WEEKS LATER. THE 1-6 PRECINCT

Olivia sat in her office talking on the phone. She and Dani had been conversing for quite a while.

"You still haven't told Dickie about you and Elliot? It's been two weeks!"

"I know. It's just, I've been so busy with work and Kat and El and Dickie's had that X-Box tournament. Tonight I'll tell him…definitely."

"Good. I miss you!"

"Me too, so much! Two weeks is too long to be away from you! When are you guys coming back from Hawaii?"

"This weekend."

"Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod!"

"I know! I can't wait! Liv, you are going to die when you see me!"

"Dani, what did you do?" Dani gave a hearty laugh.

"You are so impatient!"

"and you love me for it, now spill!" Olivia demanded playfully.

"Okay. I'm sending you a picture. Tell me when you get it." within seconds, Olivia's phone alerted her to the incoming message. She quickly grabbed it from the desk to take a look. She screamed with delight when she saw the picture of a straight haired, newly brunette Dani, complete with a haircut just like her own.

"Oh my god, Dani I love it! It's amazing!"

"Aww, thanks. I was hoping you'd like it.

"I love it, when did you decide to do it?"

"Believe it or not, it was Dean's idea! You know Little Olivia took everything from him, her brown eyes, her dark skin, her hair. Dean always jokes that she looks more like she came from you instead of me." Olivia laughed. It was true. Her goddaughter really did look like a miniature version of herself. There was no trace of Dani at all. Any time she was anywhere with little Olivia, even when Dani was present, people always complimented Olivia on what a beautiful little girl she had and she and Dani always got a kick out of it. Little Olivia even called her 'Auntie Mommy'. Dani continued telling Olivia how Dean thought it would be great if she tried dying her hair, reasoning that if she didn't like it, she could always go back. Once the dye job was complete, he suggested the styling and when it was all done, Dani was in love with her new look.

"Well, I think it looks great! A pair of brown contacts and we'd really look like sisters!" Olivia joked.

"That's exactly what Dean said!" Dani laughed, way too amused and seemingly not at all concerned with her husband's obvious obsession with her best friend. "Anyway, I'd better get going. Sit Dickie down and tell him!"

"I will."

"Tonight!"

"I will. Love you, bye!"

***

BENSON-STABLER RESIDENCE

That night, during dinner, it was especially quiet in the Benson-Stabler house. Olivia and Dickie just sat there, at opposite ends of the kitchen table, giving each other awkward glances while they picked over their food in silence. Little Kat just sat there happily eating her dinner, then chugged her glass of milk and burped.

"Mommy, can I go watch TV now?"

"yeah baby, come on." Olivia said as she got up from the table and lifted Kat onto her hip, carrying her to the living room. A minute later, she re-entered the kitchen and began clearing the dishes from the table. Again, there was the awkward stare.

"We need to talk!" they said to each other at the same time.

"You go first." again, in perfect sync. There was a brief silence before Dickie spoke up.