Chapter 11: "Lucky"

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Evan sat backstage, alone in EGO's dressing room and staring at himself in the vanity mirror

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Evan sat backstage, alone in EGO's dressing room and staring at himself in the vanity mirror. His own fans had been telling him to jump. Had they wanted to see him hurt himself? Or maybe they just wanted a show.

Evan couldn't even be sure why he had climbed to the top of the pillar. He initially wanted to spot the heckler that started the booing but once he had gotten to the top, the thought had escaped him. Instead, a darker one had taken form of him allowing himself to fall into the black sea of fans below him.

Except maybe he'd never hit the ground, he thought. Maybe he'd just keep falling and falling never to find an end. Evan looked down at the alcohol in his hand. If he continued on this path he told himself, this lifestyle would for sure be the death of him he thought.

    "At least you'll go out doing what you love," he says aloud despite the room being empty.

He took a large ceremoniously swig, finishing off his second bottle of the evening.

    He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, his mind drifting to the glowing girl from the club. She had been wearing a white top and a similar outfit as the bottle service girls.

He wondered if she worked in the club or if he had imagined her. She had appeared out of nowhere like a trick of his mind just before he planned to take a dive. All the adrenaline coupled with the alcohol and drugs he had taken before the show, Evan knew it was a high likelihood she had only been a hallucination and he felt an ache of sadness that she had not been real. 

Until she came charging through the dressing room door, her angelic features gone and replaced with a fiery rage.

          "Who the hell do you think you are?" She is advanced toward him with her teeth bared.

She was even more attractive up close, under the fluorescents of the dressing room and out of the dimly lit club. He took in her appearance, wanting to reach out and touch her. Wanting to be sure she was real.

He opened his mouth to ask her how she got backstage but he stopped himself and changed direction mid-sentence.

"What happened to your face?"

He hadn't been able to see her features from so far away but now that they were close, he saw her blackened eye and cracked lip. He noticed small bruises by her shirt collar as well, visible depending on how she moved her neck. Seeing the imperfections, confirmed her as a human to his dreamy thoughts and he started to find her more attractive that she hadn't put on makeup to hide it.

"You think jumping off a ledge is going to solve all your problems," she said, jamming him on his shoulder with her finger and ignoring his question.

          Evan couldn't figure out why this girl cared what happened to him but he found her passion sexy.

           "Well it doesn't," she continued on her rampage. "What about the damage you leave behind? The trauma on these people's lives!"

She waved her hand behind her, insinuating the crowd on the other side of the walls.

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