ᴍʏ sᴛᴀʀʙᴏʏ

Out

HI GUYS- UHM SO LIKE- I PUT THIS SONG BECAUSE I FREAKING LOVE HARRY HES PRECIOUS AND SINGS BEAUTIFULLY-IM SORRY FOR THIS BAD PART I HAD TO GIVE YOU GUYS SOMETHING BUT I HAVENT BEEN VERY MOTIVATED TO WRITE IM S O R R Y I LOVE YOU ALL-IM SO FUCKING SORRY FOR NO T UPDATING BUT WHY ARE YOU ALL READING THIS SHIT??? ITS COMPLETE TRASH

{dracos pov}
"Whatever you want, love."
     Love
/ləv/

noun
1.
an intense feeling of deep affection.
"babies fill parents with feelings of love"
Similar:
deep affection
fo 2.
a great interest and pleasure in something.
"his love for football"

verb
feel a deep romantic or sexual attachment to (someone).
"do you love me?"

    Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit.
What. The. Actual. Fuck. He kissed me. He told me I told him that I like him. Oh Merlin. Pansy. I have to tell her. She's going to freak. She acts as if she's my mum. Oh no. Mum. She's going to freak out even more.
These were some of the thoughts racing through my head at the time. Everything was happening way to fast. I have to-
     "Hello? Earth to Draco?", Theo asked concerned.
     "Hmm? Yeah. Hi."
     "You okay? You're spacing out on us again."
Harry looked over grinning like the prick he is. Rolling my eyes, I looked back at Theo.
      "Sorry and also where the hell are we? What is this place?"
       "It's a pancake place you ding dong.", Theo said laughing.
        Theodore Nott was a close friend of mine, not unlike Pansy or Blaise. He had shaggy hair and and fun smirk. Not quite like Harry's though. Crap, I need to stop thinking about him and focus on what I'm going to eat here. I picked up an oddly sticky menu (urgh) and read through it. Nothing even in the slightest healthy.
       "Hey there I'm Wanda and I'll be taking your order today."
        Everyone ,but me, placed their orders and drinks relatively quickly and as soon as Wanda turned to me I smiled weakly and said-
        "I'll just take a water thanks."
        "You sure sweetheart? You could use a couple of pancakes yourself."
         Mustering a quick, faux laugh, I nodded. I didn't want to look at anybody or say anything. A lump in my throat began to build and I could feel my lungs trying to press air in and out but it was impossible. Excusing myself to use the bathroom, practically knocking into everything, I finally fucking made it to the bathroom. Running my hands through my hair I could feel the sharp edges of the stars along my finger tips. The bathroom door opened as someone left, and I pushed passed them and pushed down the dawning feeling of dread sitting in my stomach once again.
           Not now, not ever. Please, please, please. I can't be acting like a crazy person right now. To many people. To many eyes. Watching, staring. They were watching me walk away and laughing at me. Pointing. That lady with her son, I could practically hear her whispering, "Now, don't be like him. He's got monsters living in him. He's worthless and a disgrace. Be like the other boy with the perfect black hair and green eyes and crooked smile. He's certainly not broken. No, no, no. He has no worries or monsters. Well, at least not like the other boy"
               Breathe. In. Out.
               In. Out.
               In. Out.
               In. Out.    
               In. Out.
               In.
               Out.
               Out.
       I need it out of me.

         And I know just how.

            *third person*

           Draco Malfoy was panicking. That was obvious. But, what he didn't know was why. He for sure didn't know that someone dealing with these kinds of thoughts can be triggered in any way possible. A wrong look or word, a simple touch, nothing at all, these were all triggers. They could send them into a panic attack. Which was the absolute worst.
             Draco didn't know what was going on. He thought he simply had something growing inside, something black and cold and sharp and scary. He thought it could be taken out, or carved out. That certainly wasn't the case.
             But, he didn't know that.

hi guys i'm so sorry for not updating oml i've been super unmotivated and shit all the usual excuses i have. here's a little something. but why do you guys read this??? it's terrible??? stop adding it to ur libraries and voting for it??? please??? i'll try and get something better for the next update :) love you all! kisses 😚