Why Her (SNSD Fanfiction)

Chapter 4

No One's POV

Everyone were either all dried up, passed out from exhaustion from all the crying, looked broken, or felt empty or was just staring into space. But no one can compare to what Taeyeon felt and looked like, she looks like someone in the movies who just lost everything and was just lost. She was in her room lying on her bed with her head on her knees crying. Her tears can't seem to stop even if she feels she's all dried out. Then she saw something on her desk. It was a picture of her and Tiffany during the time they went to Disneyland just the two of them with their manager to visit Tiffany's family. It was their favorite picture and memory together. She hugged the frame and lay on the bed. Then she saw a box on the corner of her bed under a pillow. It was a box and inside it were a coloring book she hasn't had yet and a couple of adorable Jack Skeleton figurines. Of course her eyes lit up like a child and then she saw a letter underneath the box. It was Tiffany's hand writing, "Hey Tae! Surprise! I know how you love Jack so much (sometimes more than me hehe just joking Tae) and my family went to a couple of Disneylands so I told them if they could look for Jack themed merchandise and they did! They're cute right?! Do like them? Hahah –Love Pany-ah!" it read and Tae just burst out crying again. 

Taeyeon's POV                                            

"..we did everything we could...she has stage 4 cancer...25-75 percent chance....more than half don't survive..."....Pany-aah~...you idiot! why didn't you tell us! Why didn't you tell me?! I thought we had no secrets! And you really had time to look for these huh? Yo-you! Sigh. You never change Pany-ah, you're still the caring, selfless, reliable, humble person. I love them, thank you Pany-ah....she thought while laying on her bed. After how many minutes of contemplating and mostly crying on the bed, I finally had the strength to get up and walk out to the living room where the girls are and hopefully I can go say thank you to Pany-ah.

As I walked out to the leaving room everyone was there all looking exhausted and lost, I can't blame them, Seo went to me and asked if I was okay.to be honest I don't know what I feel right now, I  feel empty and drained. I just nodded my head and smiled weakly at the girls. I saw the manager and asked if it was okay to see her. He was a bit skeptical at first but the he agreed but only I can enter for the meantime, the girls didn't oppose and I slowly made my way to the room that I once loved so much but know I dreaded going there. I don't know if I'm ready to see Pany-ah yet, but I want to see her, to hug her, and I wanna say thank you, so I slowly entered her room and there she was, her room had different machines and monitors, she had a lot of tubes on her and her room looked very different, it looked like a hospital. I sat by her bed and carefully held her hand. It was cold and she was very pale, I feel like crying again and the fact that I can't do anything for her makes me hate me even more.

All of a sudden I felt a movement and I could see that she's waking up, I leaned on her bed and held her hand tighter, I felt her squeeze it and I had a smile on face. She looked at me questioningly as if asking me what's going on, but she figured it out before I had the chance to say anything. She apologized to me over and over again, saying that she's sorry for not being strong enough, for causing trouble again, for making everybody worried especially me, I can't believe her, she's sick all she's thinking about is everybody else, at that point I just hugged her and told her it wasn't her fault.

We stayed that way for a couple of seconds; honestly I could hug her all day, even if she smelt like alcohol like the ones the hospital use. But we had to pull away at some point but I held on to her hand, she motioned me to get in bed and lay down with her and I couldn't refuse, I held on to her and she hugged me and rested her head on the crook of my neck. "I remember back them we used to sleep like this every day, right?" I asked her in a soft voice. I could feel her nod and I just smiled and held her tighter."Tae....I'm sorry for not telling you.." she said I just shrugged and kissed her forehead. \