Why Her (SNSD Fanfiction)

Chapter 6

Taeyeon's POV

Well after explaining ourselves to the girls and eating dinner tonight it was Soo's turn to spend the night with Pany-ah since she won the game we were all playing. I thought for sure I'd win and spend more time with her tonight but I guess being with her for most of the day today will do for now.

We were all preparing for bed since we all have schedule tomorrow, Soo's already in Pany-ah's room making herself comfortable. We were still figuring out when to tell the girls about our relationship, we need to tell them soon 'cause it feels awful to hide this fact from them and the sooner we tell them the sooner we can act more lovey dovey in the house.

Everyone's already in their room and I'm the only one left in the living room watching TV then I heard a door open and I thought it was Yoong since she's always hungry and might want to eat again before bed but to my surprise it was Pany-ah, I immediately smiled at her and gave her some room so she can sit beside me on the couch, but no, she much rather preferred sitting on my lap and I'm not complaining, she gave me a kiss on my forehead and the on my lips "Hmmm..What are you doing here? It's late you should sleep Soo's waiting for you." I said to her "I thought you'd be here and I guessed right, I just wanna give you a goodnight kiss TaeTae." She replied with her eyes smiling like crescents, "Goodnight Pany-ah~ I love you." I said to her while giving her a peck and she giggled cutely and wished me goodnight with one final kiss on the lips and went back to her room.

I went to my room not long after, and laid in bed with ginger already tucked in his side of the bed. It's already around 1 or maybe 2 am in the morning and I still haven't slept at all, I genuinely don't feel sleepy, so I sat up and looked around my room looking for anything interesting. My eyes landed on a box inside my closet, it was kinda old and it smelled old, when I got near it I realized it was all my stuff from the previous dorm we were in, the one where we all moved in when we were trainees. I honestly forgot it was here, I thought I lost it or it was back home, I never expected it to be here, so I looked through all the stuff inside. It was a big box and it was mostly filled with music scores, lyrics and some notes from when we were trainees. Its nostalgic rediscovering these old memories, it's like I took a trip down memory lane. I found a couple of old photos of me and Pany-ah, there were stacks of letters from her too, and I found a box and it was filled with friendship bracelets, key chains and stuff Pany-ah gave me back then.  To be honest I didn't actually remember some of them and I don't really remember where I put them now so I' m very impressed and thankful to the younger me for being so thoughtful in organizing and keeping all of this. After almost emptying the box, right in the very bottom is a notebook, maybe a diary of some sort.

It was a diary, MY diary, I was a bit surprised 'cause I thought for sure I lost this a long time ago. As expected it was full of stupid scribbles and doodles, I never really wrote a meaningful log into it, it was mostly just me being bored during rehearsals.  I'm going through the pages and I realized that half of the notebook was indeed logged into; I actually wrote stuff in it, it was almost 13 years ago I didn't remember I did write stuff in here. The first entry was when I met Pany-ah for the first time and I found out we were roommates, '...she's a little weird and her accent's way off, but she's beautiful and her eye-smile is to die for, they turn to crescents when she smiles.' Were the lined that really made me smile, Even way back then I was already starting to like you Pany-ah. I thought to myself. The proceeding pages were mostly about experiences with Pany-ah, funny moments I remember clearly and some that honestly, I didn't even remember happening, but thanks to this diary of mine I recalled most of them and even if I don't remember I still have written proof that it did.

While reading the pages of the diary a bunch of pictures fell out, I scrambled to find all the pictures and when I'm sure I got all of them that's when I realized they had writing on their backs, the pictures where of me and Pany-ah and a certain picture caught my attention. It was a picture of us kissing using tangerines in one of the radio shows, I remembered that pretty well, it was one of my favorite moments we shared, '..we kissed‼ Well technically we kissed the tangerines but still we KISSED‼ I swear my ears are red it's a good thing no one noticed. Today is officially my new favorite day‼ Pany-ah if only you knew my feelings for you‼"  was written on the back of the picture. I had to laugh at my younger self's enthusiasm and dorkiness. After I finished reading the notebook and the pictures, I carefully put them inside a drawer on my nightstand. I laid back down in bed and reminisced about everything, I mean I knew Pany-ah and I have had the most memories and experience together but I never thought we had THAT much memories, but I'm upper happy we do.