Exes With Feelings (h.s)

e i g h t

L i l y R o s e

"Don't worry about taking your shoes off, Haz."

He stopped his movements as he stood on the front door mat and slipped his foot back into his trainers. Once he had stood upright again, his eyes scanned the room for a moment.

The apartment had quite a retro colour scheme - a funky rug filled with all sorts of colours was situated in the living area, surrounded by leather sofas, and prints of old music artists scattered the walls. The most noticeable feature of the living space was a beautiful white record player that sat on a yellow stand with endless vinyls beneath it. At the front of the vinyl pile was, of course, Harry's debut album.

That must've been the first thing he noticed because he pointed it out, saying, "I've heard that's pretty good."

"Well, you've heard correctly." I grinned.

The rest of my grand tour consisted of small talk between the two of us, Harry often mocking me, and him complimenting the place. It all ran smoothly... that was until we got to my bedroom. Everything was decorated nicely and was all neat; however, I seemed to have forgotten what I had been sleeping in for the past few days, and that I had hung it over the top of my headboard: his old Pink Floyd t-shirt.

My luck was obviously testing me as he had instantly spotted his possession. He didn't really say anything - he just smirked.

"I promise I'm not a weirdo who sleeps with it every night. It was just the first thing I saw in my wardrobe. Here, you can have it ba-"

He interrupted my rambling by saying, "Keep it. I like you having it." Unsure of what to say next, I smiled and quickly stashed the t-shirt into my top drawers. We got to the end of the stairs and were only a few metres away from the front door. "It's a lovely place you've got here. I think we should've decorated our apartment like this." Our? Is that what he calls it still? "Anyways, I should get going."

"You should stay." I blurted out, mentally smacking myself on the wrist for being so impulsive. "For lunch. It would be nice to have a proper catch up." Something seemed to have lit up in his eyes as he nodded.

We sat down in the kitchen, and Harry insisted on doing the cooking. I pointed to where everything was, and he was soon holding up pasta in one hand and rice in another. Looking at me sat on the kitchen stool as if he wanted me to choose which one I wanted, he hummed as I picked the rice. As he cooked chicken to go alongside it, I sighed contently as he rambled on about how he had been in Japan a few months ago and how much he loved it. He said how he wished I would've been there as he thinks that I would have fallen in love with it. After, he told me about his mum and how he thinks that she might have a new special someone, but isn't quite sure. She misses me, according to him.

Throughout lunch, the conversations continued and not once did we stop talking. He asked me about my family and what they were all up to. I told him about my dad retiring and suddenly wanting to go to Spain for a month with mum.

"I can't imagine Rob not working. He's always been so invested into it - I thought he would be working for like, ever!" Harry announced after his last mouthful of rice.

"I know, me too..." I paused, looking at his plate. "Vegetables."

"What?"

"Eat your vegetables."

He rolled his eyes, picking up his fork. "Sorry, forgot you were my mum."

Our eyes locked for a split second, before the two of us burst out into a fit of laughter. Nothing was really that funny, but the two of us often found the stupidest things hilarious if we were together. Also, I think that the broken tension was such a relief so that was probably the main reason we were both so happy.

He had matured so much since the last time we were together. His shoulders were broader, his laugh deeper, and he had even grown the slightest bit of facial hair.

The laughter soon died down and we were now just chatting away. It went on like this for hours; we had so much to talk about.

We had moved to the sofa where we could see the sky darkening through the large window ahead of us. As the outside world got dark and gloomy, so did our conversations.

"It was tough, Lil. You broke my heart into a million pieces." My legs were crossed as I sat like a child facing him, and Harry had his hands on his knees as he was turned away. "I really didn't know what to do with myself... I still don't, to be completely honest. Mum came and lived with me for a few weeks, but I just wanted to be alone. She was scared for me, I guess. She knew how much you meant, well mean, to me. I was so completely, and utterly lost."

My heart ached for him. I felt tears burning in the corners of my eyes as he confessed his heartbreak, and he didn't mask his watery eyes too well either. "I know, H. I hate myself for what I did to you - to us. That was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I hate that the world stopped us from having the fairytale life that we had envisioned."

"You're blaming our heartbreak on the world?" his eyebrows raised when he finally looked at me.

I nodded firmly, "Damn right, I am."

We both laughed a very sad laugh, now allowing the tears to roll freely, filling the silent apartment.

Then, for a good 10 minutes, it was silent. We stared at the black sky, not uttering a word. The tranquility was perfect, yet so unbelievably awful.

"I missed you, Lily Rose."

"I missed you too, Harry."