Chasing waves

Moving on

Charlotte pov

Waking up to the sound of an alarm clock after a nightmare on a Monday morning isn't something I would wish on my enemies as it's horrible, who wants to get up early for school, definitely not me for sure. As I look at the alarm clock I grin appears on my face as I throw it at the nearest wall, I watch as it breaks apart as soon as it hits the wall, next time it be a hammer which sounds like a good idea I think to myself. As I lie back down on my bed looking at the ceiling I give myself a couple of minute to calm down before I take myself downstairs to the grandparents but my bed has other ideas. As I go to climb out of bed my feet get tangled in the covers and I fall face first on the floor, definitely not the first time I went head over heals out of bed and I'm sure it won't be the last. I quickly jump up and dust my self off like that didn't just happen before making my way downstairs to my favourite place in the house... the kitchen. 

"Still having nightmares sweetie, maybe we should see someone about them" my grandad says worried about me as it looks like I only got two hours sleep with black bags under my eyes, I know hes worried about me but I am getting tired of telling him I am fine when we both know I am far from that word 'fine'. As he looks at me he already knows what I'm about to say but he knows I'm having nightmare still as he calms me down when I wake up pouring with sweaty which drops of me. I have struggled for two years ever since that accident with the parents and it doesn't appear to get any easier. 

"There just flash backs of us crashing, I'll be fine I swear" I respond with a small smile as I can only remember the lorry travelling towards us at full speed and my parents taking there last breath as it's stuck in my mind unfortunately, sometimes I wish I could only remember the good times but recently the good times are drifting and the nightmares are taking there place. 

"Ok. Come on get ready for school, or you be late. Again" my grandad says with sass as I was only late once or twice actually about eight times last month. Laughing to his sass he starts pushing me towards the stairs hoping I get dressed quickly which I tend to do sometimes but other times I'm in no rush to get dress and leave. My grandparents have been looking after me since the accident which I am grateful for but sometimes I wish my parents was still alive.

I quickly throw on a pair of high waisted shorts with an oversized jumper before heading downstairs back to the kitchen for my breakfast I help with but think would my life be different if my parents was still alive. Taking my seat I start scoffing food down my face but I stop when I picture catches my eye, I though he got rid of them all. The picture was me two years ago when I won nationals at surfing, I have the trophy in my hand and the biggest smile on my face. A couple of tears start to roll down my face as that was also the day my parents told me they was proud of me and the women I become but then the crash happened straight after taking the happiest day away from me and replacing it with my worst. That day is no longer a day that I want to remember more like a day I want to forget but unable to. 

"Your parents were incredible proud of you that day, they couldn't stop smiling when you won" grandad says picking up the photo with a smile as he remembers and getting a closer look but I can't look at it again without breaking down in tears as I only see the day I remember; death. 

"Why don't you try surfing again hunny, you loved it. We could never get you off the board at one point" grandma says smiling but I remember that day clearly, I wanted to play longer but mother wouldn't let me. As I remember the day I turn to my grandma who has a smile on her face, everyone has happy memories of my parents and I wish I could remember some instead of that day but each time I try to think about the good, the bad just return and take over my thoughts. 

"It's been two years since you stopped Lottie" grandad says looking at me with tearful eyes, I don't want to disappoint them but I just can't do what they are asking me, they have been hoping I will return one day but when my biggest supporters are ripped away from me I don't see the point anymore, my parents loved watching me and I did it for them.