yungblud oneshots

22- insecurities:

A/N: sorry for the slow updates, i have no inspiration plus life's been such a mess recently. but, read until the end to help me out, i got a question :) also, this is something different. i'm not sure if i have guys who read this too, this is probably gonna be a one time thing¯\_(ツ)_/¯ oh and TW: eating disorder and mentions of rape. touchy subjects for many, including me. there's gonna be more happy soon :))

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come on, please... just... gffjdj... ugh... don't do that!

"Ugh, I give up!" I huffed in frustration, staring at everything I hated about myself in the mirror. The button on my jeans won't do up, they did last week without the hassle. Have I put weight on? Am I getting fat? I'm definitely getting fat... Dominic ain't gonna want me anymore... he won't want me if I look like this, would he? 

"I gotta stop eating if this is gonna happen... fuck, I'm ugly." I sighed to myself, defeated by a piece of clothing and my conscience. My biggest insecurity has always been my weight, I was never the skinniest kid in in my class, but I tried to be. I used to sit up in my bedroom for weeks without eating a thing, it's not like my dad ever cared. After my mum passed, he became abusive towards me... I hate to think about it, but there was a time where he came home drunk and... you know, 'touched' me. Every time I said no, he got angry. Real angry. I got so scared, I ran away from home and moved in with my best friend, Reese. She was the only person who helped me escape the madness in my life. Even after all of the most traumatic things in my life, I still managed to be myself, keeping that happy front up. Being that 'happy' y/n everyone knew. 

"Hey, love. What were ya shoutin' about?" Dominic startled me, I turned on my heel quickly to face him. My stomach flipped at the thought of him hearing me talk down on myself. Dom gets upset when I call my myself names or insult how I look. He always tells me about how amazing I am and how perfect my body is. He's so sweet.

"O-oh, nothing, Dommie. Just had a sudden outburst for no reason." I chuckled nervously, scratching the back of my hand to keep chill. Dominic's eyes scanned my body, noticing that I hadn't done up my jeans.

"Why're ya jeans undone? Did ya know they were?" I looked down, acting surprised. My eyes widened.

"Shit, must've forgot to button them back up. Thanks for telling me." I gave Dom my best fake smile, hoping he wouldn't realise how upset I was feeling with myself. He smiled back and pressed a small kiss to my nose, wrapping his arms around me. I felt tears welling up in my eyes, trying my hardest to hold them back. But, I failed. One of the warm droplets hit Dom's shoulder. He shifted, pulling me back to stare directly into my eyes. The happiness, that were in them moments before, faded.

"What's wrong, love? Did I do somethin'?" I shook my head, rubbing my eyes to get rid of the tears. Do I tell him?

"I-I just... I can't button my jeans up anymore. I think I've put weight on and I hate it, I wanna look okay in whatever I wear... I'm embarrassed of me." Dominic looked like he was about to cry, and I was right. His eyes were leaking uncontrollably. I felt so bad. Maybe I shouldn't of said anything.

"Love, don't say that. Do you know how fookin' perfect you are? Do I have to remind you? Every little thing about you is extraordinary. Your figure is shaped to absolute perfection, your nose is cute like a little button, your smile lights up the room whenever you walk in, your voice sings me to sleep on those anxiety-filled nights... and your eyes, fook. There's somethin' in them that makes me fookin' crazy for ya, I forever find myself lost when we share glances. You don't understand how much I fookin' love you for you. So what if you've put a little weight on? I don't love you any less than I do now. My heart is yours and only yours, I wouldn't want anyone else in the world. If I cared about what you looked like, I'd give you MY permission to hit me with ya car." I held back a little laugh at the last part, seeing Dom's face soften.

"I love you, y/n. You're ma one and only. Don't ever change cuz ya don't need to." Dominic wrapped his arms around me tightly, crushing me in his chest. I listened to his beating heart, the soft thumps relaxing me.

"I love you too, Dommie. Thank you for everything." He hummed, keeping his hold on me.

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Henlo :) hope everyone is doing great!

so, my question: is there any subject/scenario you want to see? I know I've asked this a billion times, but inspiration is honestly shorter than me... and I'm extremely short :) let me know in the comments OR you can pm me...

or just let me know on my instagram: georgie_leigh_m / yungblud account is _im_so_paranoid_

bye :))))