Loving in Silence

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"Merlin! You're awake!! What is the last thing you remember?" Gaius, Arthur, and Morgana interrogate me the minute I open my eyes.

"We were returning from the a visit to the Catha at the Holy Island. How did I get here?"

"You are absolutely certain that you remember nothing after that? Absolutely certain?" Arthur questions, an angry sadness behind his eyes.

"Yes, now what's going on?" I fire back.

"This is worse than I feared, Sire. I cannot cure this if he doesn't remember yesterday."

"Cure what?? What is happening to me yesterday??"

"Maybe my magic can heal him."

"Heal what? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? And why does it matter that I remember nothing after leaving the Holy Island? That was yesterday!!" I finally shout, drawing their attention towards me.

"Merlin, we left the Holy Island almost two and a half years ago." Arthur admits.

"You're lying. I know it was yesterday, I haven't forgotten two whole years," I stammer, pushing against my temples with my palms, "there is no way that is true."

"You've only forgotten a fortnight, Merlin." Morgana corrects kindly.

"Arthur just said it has been two years, so can I have only forgotten a fortnight? That is if I believe you," I retort, "which I don't."

"You took a cursed arrow for me . . . " Arthur slowly fills in the blanks, the story making more and more sense as he does.

"And then I died?"

"More or less." He says softly.

"Why am I wearing a ring with your crest?"

"It's unimportant, you don't have to keep it." He murmurs, Morgana and Gaius looking at him sadly for some reason.

"Oh . . . well ok." I take off the ring and give it back to him.

"Try to get some sleep, you'll feel better." Gaius orders, ushering out the king and princess.

- Morgana -
"Why didn't you tell him." I wheel around and confront my brother the moment we're out of earshot.

"Morgana, what would you have me say? Hi Merlin, you don't remember falling in love with me but we're married, surprise!!" He scoffs.

"I would have you tell him the truth and now is the perfect moment!" I exclaim, "If you don't tell him now, you may never get another chance like this."

"Morgana, it's not that simple." He replies, emotionally pushing me away.

"Then explain it, because I see two people who love each other in loads of different kinds of pain, and you can ease it. So why don't you?" I cross my arms and stand my ground.

"Because he doesn't love me, Morgana!" Arthur yells. "Or if he does, he doesn't remember it!"

"So remind him, brother."

"You heard Gaius yesterday, we have no idea what that could do." He says in an un-Arthury small voice. "It could hurt him."

"Arthur, Gaius was uncertain. No one has returned from the dead before as far as I am aware. You must try."

"No, Morgana. No, and that is final. I will not risk hurting him for my own selfing gain. If that means he never finds out, then I will gladly love him in silence, do you know why? Because a few days ago, he was dead. Stone cold dead. And now he isn't. So if Merlin remembers on his own, then we can be together. If not, then so be it. At least he's alive." He's sobbing now, tears rolling down his cheeks.

"Arthur . . . "

"I have some things to take care of, will you tend to him in my stead?"

"Of course." I kiss his cheek and exit, leaving my brother to express his grief in his sought solitude.

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